Dreaming (still) ...

挥去离别的愁绪，踏上人生新的旅程

2007-07-24T00:59:00.000+08:00

Saw the above couplet on the many banners that can be seen hanging around the school - Nanjing University of Information Science and Technology (NUIST). Thought it is quite meaningful, and can be a motivational verse for those graduating...

Recently have to say a lot of goodbye. A colleague who had worked for 5 years in Met services had just left to join the private sector. To me was really quite unexpected. Sighs of good times in the job market...

The most difficult of all must be the goodbye to our condo house. Have to shift back to our old house at Ubi. Arrgh, no more beautiful surroundings, but the thing i will miss most will be the convenient public transport...

A friend's webhosting company

2007-03-09T00:21:00.000+08:00

Xssist provides web hosting, VPS and dedicated servers.

What an eventful night

2007-02-02T01:15:00.000+08:00

Just reached home about 45 mins ago. Time is 1.15 am. And tomorrow I gotta wake up early. But though I am feeling very sick now, my heart is feeling light, after witnessing some goodness in Singaporeans.

Was waiting at the bus stop opposite Bras Basah complex after supper (or dinner) and after wsdp. Saw this tiny old lady sitting on the kerb of the busstop, her legs and stuffs extending into the road. It was dark and she is in a very dangerous position to get hit by the bus stopping at the stop. However she refused to budge at all from concern passer-by. However everytime a cab passes she will move her hands up as if to wave for the cab.

Another small group of people was trying to help her hail a cab but no taxi, NO TAXI will stop at that time: ~11.15pm. Me and Isis was watching from the side, then I decided to call a cab. But nah, no one on the line. Then Isis tried to called the police. But then finally a cab stopped, SHA 4578Z. He allowed the lady to get on but he will only mumble punggol-sengkang. Anyone ask her anything that will be her only response. The other other thing she will say occasionally is that she only need to mention this and others will know where she stays...

No choice, the driver called the police, but waited for damn long. Till most of the crowd have left us, except me and two other ladies. I offer to go to the station with the driver, since I was the only longest-staying eye-witness around. And we went. The police said they will keep a look out for lost person report, as well as to take her fingerprint to get her identity. Hopefully her family can pick her back soon. One thing I felt very guilty was I couldn't speak hokkien and couldn't pacify her as much as I could. Cos I could feel the disappoint in her when we brought her to the police station. Her hand was holding $10 bill. She thought she could go home straight away. Anyway when I helped her down the taxi, I realised her leg was injured and couldn't walk properly...

After that the driver sent me home but he refused to take my money. Goodness me, he had the 'Tampines' tag on his taxi before he stopped for us, he bear with all the trouble and the time that he could possible earn in that hour or so, and now he refused to charge me. I had to insist then he only took $10 bill.

Any suggestion to send a compliment to him? SHA 4578Z. He lives in sengkang area. Haha... From my conversation with him...

Check it out

2006-12-26T00:01:00.000+08:00

"... at The Dating Loft, we host relaxed and exclusive singles’ events for professionals looking for a fun night out and the opportunity to meet other single people without any pressure."

IPPT

2006-12-07T00:37:00.000+08:00

Got silver standard today, at Bedok Camp

Pull-up 11 5pts
Sit-up 39 5pts
SBJ 239 5pts
Shuttle Run 9.6 5pts
2.4 run 11.38 3pts

Some Updates

2006-11-20T23:38:00.000+08:00

Love my office. Love the fact that it faces the runway. And love the fact that wind direction has changed so that most flights will take off in the direction facing me. Now i can see the planes clearer...

Work nothing much, except we have formed a small group of CS khakis... They call it the Brotherhood of Counter Strike. Sigh, din expect ppl still so siao on CS. Even though i cannot make it one, I joined them nevertheless... Sports on thursday at east coast still as usual, although the attendance rate is getting very bad. Probably due to the rainy season, people don;t feel like exercise...

Have joined a soccer team recently. They played every sunday at Taman Jurong. Got 2 full field there. Very nice, i mean i finally got to feel how is it like to play in a full field with a referee, no linesman though... The team is mostly uncles in their 30s n 40s. And with beer belly. And they smoke a lot. But they can all play pretty well and a few of them, their stamina is amazing... I am very guilty to say the least.

Have played with them for about a month now. A bit exasperating at times cos I am forced to sit out, especially when that day i am on fire. But bo bian, sometimes a lot of pple come, so have to be considerate, cum my field soccer skills are quite sucky... With studs boots (different from flat boots for street soccer) i can't do those dribbling skills that i'm good at. Each team have to pay $100 for the field and the referee and the facilities. Quite reasonable i would say, but now dunno what to do about my sec sch friends. My 10+ yrs street soccer gang play at the exact day and exact time. Should I alternate between street soccer and field soccer and later turn out that I'll flunk at both? :s

中国人的厉害！

2006-11-05T21:25:00.000+08:00

Was shell-shocked today at the clean and green week today at the Republic Polytechnic.

Was there trying to set-up our place since 7am. when finally it was done at around 9 and we starting distributing the free gifts (our is the main crowd puller, cos we gave out waterbottles and towels). That's when my nightmare began. Everything happened so quickly. The instruction was simple, you have to go to another table to get the survey forms and filled it up, so that you won't just come to the booth to get the gifts.

But everyone don't care. They will just crowd around the booth with the forms, some din even filled it up, some din even have the form or demand that we have to help them fill. These are all those RCs folks, those catered by buses after their brisk walks activities etc... But this scenario only lasted for a few minutes.

Everyone just pushed further and further in and threatened to grew completely out of control.. My colleague and I were practically pushed all the way back to the walls. I was just wondering they might as well help themselves to the our stuff, not much difference from how they are behaving now... Anyway the other organisers kept sending signals to me that PM is walking by soon, and I'm under tremendous pressure to clear that impossible crowd in front of my tiny booth immediately. Almost wanted to give up sigh...

Anyway Io shouted that no more forms are distributed, because the distribution for this timeslot is overshot and those with forms have to queue up. Oh yah, did I mention quite large number of those crowds are Chinese PRCs? more than half i think. Those singaporeans in the queue get the hint and try to cooperate but chinese nationals simply spoil the market. Those without forms will try their best to squeeze to the front to scold me. Those with forms will try their best to cut queue. Not that there are no disgraceful singaporeans out that, who din attempt to do the same thing. It is just the quantity of PRCs thats doing that is significantly more.

I think i have typed too much, although this is just the beginning... to sum up, I feel that Chinese Nationals, based on today experience, have shown me what is true kiasuism.

1. Stupidity - obviously when they noe things aren't gg to work out if they keep pushing yr way, they shld follow my instruction. Else they are only wasting their time cos the longer they refuse to cooperate, the longer they will wait for their gifts. singaporeans are much smarter, judging from the way they try to cooperate.

2. Unreasonable - Need i say further? All the scoldings i got, all the pushing, and all the demands.

3. Extremely gian beng - all those prcs that kept begging us for more (when the situation was under control at the later stages) when their goodie bags were already so full. it is just unbelievable lor.

You have to experience them to know what I truely mean. 中国人的厉害！

Terrible

2006-10-09T11:19:00.000+08:00

Had an accident at work today...

Three stitches (two actually, but the doctor had to redo one of them -_-) on my index finger...

Why are all bad things happening to my body for the past few months? :s

Difficult Sudoku

2006-10-07T19:31:00.000+08:00

Dunno why, but feel that this puzzle is very difficult. Took a long time to get the answer.

The rules are simple, just ensure all vertical and horizontal lines contain the number from 1 to 9, as well as each 3x3 small boxes in bold contained 1 to 9 too.

Dun need to do by trial and error one, each boxes can be derived through logic and there are no ambiguity, there can only be one correct answer.

Wishing for health

2006-10-02T22:55:00.000+08:00

Wishing for good health... Maybe the readers of my blog can help to dedicate goodwill?

6 weeks ago - knocked my head twice. First time, against a wall. Second time, more serious, against my friend head...

4 weeks ago - one of my more serious injury i have sustained while playing soccer. Quadricep muscle strain class 1, or more commonly known as muscle tear. There was some internal bleeding and my thigh was pretty swollen for the first week... Have been ungoing rehab at CGH but... doing nothing else except simple stretching... and also the sports massage, by the sport instructor.

3 weeks ago till now - body kinda sick with sore throat, flu etc... weak body constitution...

And dear me, the SPORTS MASSAGE! The first time he uses his thumb, i was already shouting and screaming and almost in tears. Not to mention the second session i was already very defensive and tense, and he was using his whole arm strength...

Past week - Diarrhoea for at least 15 times. Doctor say likely food poisoning. Can't think of anything else that I ate that was different from my colleagues and family members, so conclusion is - Bak Kut Teh at east coast hawker centre... So thin liao still diarrhoea... Nothing left of me soon...

Now stomach still bloated and unwell...

Life moves on...

2006-07-12T22:50:00.000+08:00

A period of transition for me. I am grateful for the chance to join the CEP camp as a participant for probably the last time in my life.

The camp got very few people, even less than Jiahui's year, but at least it got two freshies, one of them whom check up on nusbs website by himself and join the camp from there. And also, quite fun, probably because can interact more. And I had lotsa of fun with the rubber band tricks and card tricks and those usual stupid games tricks...

Din have chance to attend much of the Dharma talks due to certain circumstances but felt that Dr Ang's talk was pretty good. I think she did not prepare for the talk at all, cos she was a bit gibberish for the first 10 mins fo the talk, but her experience in giving talks is evident and she round up the talk very well... But nevertheless, I was tired, very tired, i slept for at least 3/4 of the talk i think... Body old liao...

Some things

2006-07-06T00:51:00.000+08:00

1. Oh no, a feeling of deja vu when i spoke to a friend recently about his father. I have another friend who's father just passed away on Father's day. I really hope he will recover soon...

2. Played tennis with Darren yesterday at my place. YIPPEE! Finally found someone who is willing to teach me! He is very nice and patient! Felt that i have really learnt some stuffs, from this 1st lesson. So grateful... The feeling quite shiok, to be able to hit the ball...

3. My things always go missing when I want to find them... And i was quite sure those stuffs were lost for good. My army Certificate of Service. NEA demanded for them becos if I don't produce it, they can't add the extra NS pay to my salary. Paid $25 for it, inclusive of taxi fare to CMPB, for the replacement copy... And then, I found it out of the blue in my drawer yesterday, together with the testimonial from my superior in army... Sianz... Waste my money

Come to think of it, it always happen to me. Like I told sin his router CD was lost for good, only to found it quite a long time later. And also my Hysys CD, couldn't find it and told sin that i have searched everyway liao and i burnt from him again... Only to find it among my sister stuffs... And the list goes on...

4. Received an oversea call today from matta... As usual that guy got no good news to bring ...

Bo Liao

2006-07-01T01:18:00.000+08:00

Sms quote "Due to rain....soccer is cancelled...i am alone here guys....u all gd"

- from my friend Ang, received on 09:17 am, last sunday.

胆小鬼

2006-06-22T01:27:00.000+08:00

My first time watching super band on monday. Got a group with a cool name - 迷路兵, lost soldiers. So cool!

They sang the song by gigi. Din noe that i like this song so much till they sang it. Actually they kinda screw up the chorus, i feel... Think their voice not power enough, somehow can hear they are straining to sing the chorus part and catching up with the tempo. But think their arrangement of the song is simply great.

As expected, the meeting with the engin dept gave negative results. They admited to those mistakes that i had pointed out (i mean they are all in black and white on the website, what else can they do) but insist they are not responsible for the content put up on the website. It is a guide only. And they are busy people, its the student responsibility to clarify with them ... ...

What can i say? All i am stating is they made these big mistakes (3 crucial mistakes) and since they did not inform us, they would have to honour it. Isn't that anyone with some integrity left will do? This is probably not the first time and definitely not the last time NUS is giving such absolute nonsense.

One of the reasons i feel they are adamantly not giving me the minor is because they feared the repercussion. They mentioned that the school can't gave us because they had already made the rest of my cohort took up another module so that they can fulfill the 24MCs. They will have a lot of explaining to do if they were to give me my minor.

Fucking irresponsible department, and i would say Engineering faculty...

Bodhi Tree

2006-06-13T14:26:00.000+08:00

The Bodhi Tree or Pipal Tree (ficus religiosa)

I think bodhi trees have very strong will to survive. They always grow in whatever limited spaces they can find, eg in NUS on the slope. And they can survive all the nonsense people gave them like i have often seen people pouring milk as offering to these trees in temples.

Near my house, there are two bodhi trees. In between these trees, there is a newly setup tibetan society, Mahakala. I wonder if they chose this location because of the trees. The two trees are quite strange. One of them is actually two bodhi trees joined together at the bottom. Another also have two trees almost growing together, but the other is not a bodhi tree and looks like it is dying, while the bodhi tree is thriving very well.

Tear-ing

2006-06-09T22:10:00.000+08:00

Yup, i teared today. Actually it wasn't so bad. At least i know that my tearing function have come back after the operation... Your natural tears are much better protection than those eyedrops

Thought I would have something to update on my blog today, cos i had just went for an interview with MSD - Meteorological Services Division for the post of Meteorological Officer (Business Division). It wasn't what i had expected, I had expected more emphasis on the marketing techniques and more questions directed to my experiences etc so i would have a lot to tlak about. Turn up i screw up those few case studies questions about marketing their services and the interview was focused on the job nature. Nevertheless i was really quite interested in the job......

Memories are the strangest thing in the world. I went to JB for my eye checkup. Went to Queen St Terminal to tkae those direct bus to JB. And came back by the same way. While waiting at the busstop between lavendar and bugis, for 197 to take home, i look across the road and saw the parallel road behind, which 51, 197, etc will take when it goes to Bugis, cityhall area. I had no idea this parallel road is so close.

REalisation strike me then. I standing at the exact place of an event that took place a long time ago? (Why is it i can remember this very distant memory?). My eyes became moist. Lucky the bus came then and i took it. But now i'm in an pretty emotional state. Mabbe i should avoid that 2 roads temporary, even though i have pass through it countless times before. Strange that i happen to be in the scene today. Cos usually i would walk to bugis to take 197, but today i thought of trying out that busstop cos i had thought it would be nearer...

Or mabbe its becos the interviewer asked me why i did not put my father's details in my family particulars, thus i'm reminded... But unlikely cos whenever people mentioned him, i really din feel anything...

Mabbe i should mentioned the event. A father taking his son to cross the road in the wee hours after taking bus 51. Crossing 2 main roads, to reach the terminal to take bus to go to JB, so that his son can make his passport. And have to be early, else have to wait for super duper long, unless u r willing to pay 'extra' money...

Dentist

2006-05-26T00:30:00.000+08:00

Went back to NUS today to do some stuffs, as well as to take measurement for the graduation gown. Decide to rent it.

Happen to meet two friends today. They asked what am i doing here. Met my dentist friend too, who asked the same thing. Kinda strange. That I am at the stage where my appearance in NUS is a strange one.

ANyway back to my dentist friend. I guessed as a result of his profession (he will know the result of his license by next Fri) he observe people's teeth and mouth immediately. And his super tall height makes it easier to look into people's mouth. I guess so...

Because after i got on his car (he offered me a ride to outram mrt which i got on just so that i can catch up wif him), we were having some conversation when i suddenly ask whether he can do bleaching for my teeth. And suddenly he just went on and went about my teeth. I think he has been wanted to say since he met me earlier, just paiseh to suddenly brought up. He say the bleaching very ex, and my problem is that my teeth are dirty. (Of course they are, i just drank milo when i met him, haha) Also, my tooth is crooked due to overcrowding. I mentioned it doesn;t affect me but he said it might just change my life, as in i will dare to smile, be more confident etc. And also my chin is a little back. Due to hereditary genetic defects.

Actually i never have a problem to flash a big smile but after wat he said, i'm starting to be more conscious of my crooked tooth, and i kept looking at it in the mirror, looking at my chin too. Sigh, i really think humans create more problems by knowing more....

Lasik Done

2006-05-21T18:51:00.000+08:00

Was in Malaysia from 11th May to 20th May. Went to Segamat, then to KL for the operation, then a day later went back to Segamat, and then finally back to KL for my 1 week post-op check up.

It was really quite scary. First you will have to don a protective operation outfit. Then you will be given a medical kit. They will then put anasthetic, as well as disinfect your eyes and surrounding area. Finally the doctor will take one last look at your eyes.

I was then ushered into the operation room where there is the main surgeon, someone taking control of the computer, and 2 nurses (if i remember correctly). I lay on the bed and a strap was put over my left eye, and then a cut-out cloth was put over my right eye. I was told to focus on the red and green light ahead. They taped my right eyelid and the lower part of my right eye. They then put a clamp, to keep my eye open. More washing was done on my eye.

Finally the disgusting thing, the suction machine to suck out my eyeball. I lost all sight immediately once the suction was on. Then the keratome flap of your cornea was cut within seconds. The eyeball was then released and i could see the lifting motion of the doctor to lift up my cornea flap. The actual laser correction then took place, with some burning smell.

More washing was done and I could see the doctor putting back my flap and like wat you will do when wrapping yr tectbook in plastic cover, he smoothen the flap, to make sure the flap stays in place. Done. 1 eye. Yet another eye to go. Arrgh.

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My draft letter to DEan's Office, Vice Dean for undergraduate program

2006-05-10T01:42:00.000+08:00

Dear Prof Ashraf

Good day to you sir. I am a graduating student, from the department of chemical engineering (ChEE), enrolled in AY02/03. I took up the minor in bioengineering program in AY03/04, semester 2, and I would like to request for your assistance.

I was informed by the division of bioengineering that i did not fulfil the requirement for the minor degree recently. It came as a shock to me as i had planned my schedule precisely and correctly and had followed the requirements as found in the bioengineering minor website ( here). I was told that i need to do a minimum of 24MCs to get my minor, which had never been indicated on the bioengineering website for my batch. For those enrolled in AY04/05 onwards, this requirement was then stated ( here).

The following are my questions to them:

1. Dubious requirements listed on website

Firstly, why wasn't the 24MCs requirement indicated in the bioengineering minor website? Students like me will have to refer to it every now and then to check our progress, as well as to plan our modules schedules. The minimum they could have done is to indicate that we also have to refer to engineering general rules for minor, where they claimed there was a general rule of 24MCs for minor for our batch.

Secondly, in the requirement they have provided for our batch (here ), it was clearly indicated at the bottom:

"NB: As far as the student workload is concerned, the extra workload is from the 4 additional Multidisciplinary Modules as stated in (a) above. The other 2 Engineering Elective Modules stated in (c) above are NOT extra workload. They are part of the electives which the engineering undergraduates will have to take."

I have done the 4 additional multidisciplinary modules of "extra workload" and my 2 related chemical engineering electives, which gives a total of 22MCs. If, the requirement, as claimed, is 24MCs, then i would have to do an extra workload of a 5th Multidisciplinary Module or another elective. In either case this contradicts the requirements they have stated in italics above, where the extra workload is only from the 4 additional Multidisciplinary Modules.

If there is no contradiction, it would have meant that the bioengineering division have put incorrect information on their website.

2. Lack of accountability to students taking the minor module

I have a fellow ChEE classmate who also did the minor program. He only knew about this requirement this semester. He had taken the compulsory module BN1901 this semester and during the classes, he had learned from his Electrical Engineering (EE) counterparts that there is such a requirement. The EE students themselves only knew about this problem a semester ago. My fellow ChEE classmate then had to ask for special permission to take another module at the 3rd week of school so that he can fulfill the minor, as this is our last semester of study.

I also knew of another minor student who did not know of this rule. The division of bioengineering also acknowledge that the EE students had this problem and the division had helped them "solved" this. Assume there are at least 2 EE students involved, there are at least 4 students who had gone before me to seek help from the bioengineering division. Doesn't this quantify a significant number of minor students who did not know about the 24MCs requirement? So why is it that the division did not inform us at all or clarify with all its minor students on this issue?

3. Incorrect illustration

The division of bioengineering insisted that there is a general ruling of 24MCs for minor degree listed on the general rules for minor at the engineering website. This does not account for the fact why there was a contradiction in its requirement, or their lack of accountability. Worst of all, from 2002 all the way till 13 Jul 2005 (we were accepted into the program in Jan 2004), the web page which showed the general rules ( here) gives an illustration on how a ChEE student can obtain the bioengineering minor for those matriculated in AY02/03 onwards. If Prof sir has noticed, it adds up only to 22MCs, which is exactly the route that i had followed, and which was the requirement put up on the bioengineering minor webpage all along. No satisfactory answer on why this supposedly 'incorrect' illustration was up there but they did concede that they 'might have assumed that the chemical engineering electives are 4 MCs each'.

I inferred that the problems had occured due to the university transition to a modular system, and the shift in minor requirements for my batch onwards. Thus the fact that ChEE electives are 3 MCs each was overlooked by the division of bioengineering. As such, there exist the contradictory requirements as well as the incorrect illustration. The purpose of this email is not to point finger at anyone. Certainly the people who had put up the wrong illustration might not be around anymore. But I would like to highlight to Prof sir that i had been wrongfully denied a minor degree in my graduating semester due to others' assumptions and lack of accountability, and contradictory rules in the requirements. At the end of the day, i hope my years of careful planning and hard work in taking the extra modules would not have gone to waste, and that i can graduate with my deserved minor.

For your necessary actions please, sir.

Cordially

Shwei Lin

Losing my temper (and sabotaging myself)

2006-05-09T01:09:00.000+08:00

Had an unpleasant experience today. Was absolutely livid at this guy http://me.nus.edu.sg/people/staff.asp?staff_id=70. He is the Dep HEad for bioengin division. Looks like i have no choice but to go Dean and complain liao. To cut it short, after a long and lengthy argument about the 24MCs requirement, i gave up and i threw my trump card at him and ask him to explain about the incorrect illustration on getting the minor for a CHEE student like me found on this webpage old engin intranet (thank goodness i had a google cached of it b4 it disappeared for good). I had followed the illustration and so was it my fault? The guy was tongue-tied for a while and mumbled some incoherent stuffs about (i can't remember). Finally when i pressed him again, he said something about they might have assumed the last two chemical electives were 4MCs each (in actual fact, they are 3 MCs each, that's how my problem arose) and thus... so i immediately shot back "so was it my fault that the misleading illustration was there? was it completely my fault? he replied almost immediately and defensively, yes it is your fault.. and went on into his crap about the 24MCs requirement, everyone knows that, etc...

It is complete crap. I can't believe anyone can do that. Pushing away any responsibility at all in the face of such compelling evidence. (i was quite confident that he would have nothing else to say when i showed him the illustration.) Sigh, too tired to type out my complete n logical argument, but they are not so significant as compared to the above proof i have. Lousy prof, refusing to accept mistake the division had made earlier, and pushing it all onto the student. Sucky... will type out my full argument tmr in my website for NUSSUX.

Had a pleasant evening though. I quite enjoyed the concert, Opening the door of your heart, and the company =). Must thanks kinsong for his advice...

Presidents Breakfast

2006-05-01T22:51:00.000+08:00

Had the honor to have breakfast with NTUBS ex-president Kin Song and current president Riki on sat at ikea. saw kin song nick on friday which gave me an idea to ask him out for breakfast on sat, n he called riki along. He gave me and riki a treat that day... So paiseh... Kinsong funnily suggested ikea cafe becos 'where else can we get good coffee?' but end up 3 of us all taking tea instead... :S

Spend my friday and sat evening with weiyang and chunkit. Weiyang came over on sat afternoon to have a swim and suntan, while chunkit join us later for PS2 winning eleven showdown. As expected, they are not my match, wahaha. I thrashed them comprehensively. Chunkit though, thrashed both of us in the racing game... My hands till now quite sore, cos too long haven play such games...

Went for my cousin wedding lunch on sunday and saw calvin soh there. End up he is my uncle sister son. So complicated...

Going to KL tomorrow. Checking up on the lasik, base on my cousin recommendations. Looking forward to shopping with chunkit on thursday. Hope he knows where to get all those good deals to buy those business attire...

Some msn nicks

2006-05-01T22:23:00.000+08:00

Some msn nicks of my chem eng batch, over the stressful period of Design II project:
"please please converged!"
"queen of convergence!"
"waiting for a miracle"

from yongming blog:
"like why nus dont let us enjoy the last 4 weeks"
"dont sleep"
"weeping away"
" ji bai siao liao"

Conversation wif my 'commando' classmate...

2006-04-20T00:28:00.000+08:00

Zeathereal - SW bangseh me... says:
ming! channel8 got pull up challenge!
Zeathereal - SW bangseh me... says:
go for it!
Zeathereal - SW bangseh me... says:
haha

i dOnt knoE tHe mEAning of being Truly stronG.. says:
huh?
i dOnt knoE tHe mEAning of being Truly stronG.. says:
don wnan lar
i dOnt knoE tHe mEAning of being Truly stronG.. says:
i so lan
i dOnt knoE tHe mEAning of being Truly stronG.. says:
i pull for passion not for competition
i dOnt knoE tHe mEAning of being Truly stronG.. says:
i seen ppl do 45 lar..
i dOnt knoE tHe mEAning of being Truly stronG.. says:
i only do 32 only

Zeathereal - SW bangseh me... says:
ok, i challenge u
Zeathereal - SW bangseh me... says:
every 1 i do, u must do 3

i dOnt knoE tHe mEAning of being Truly stronG.. says:
ym say he do 5 for veyr one u do

Zeathereal: WAHHH!!!!!!

By the way, YM = to my friend, so he is saying that 3 is no challenge for him, he wants to up it to 5. Wahahaha...

My last day of lesson

2006-04-13T02:57:00.000+08:00

It is over. In a few hours time it will be my last day of lesson. Unbelievable, how time flashes by...

Project due
The past few weeks, i think is a nightmare for most chem eng students. The demanding 400 pages (we miraculously hit that target exactly, without overshot) report was ready by afternoon, around 5, but cock-up in our printing meant that we can't send for binding today. The report is due tomorrow but we do not want to get caught up in the massive jam tomorrow. I have heard that ME pple also submitting their project tmr... Have just reached home an hour plus ago, after settling that minor hiccup. One important lesson that i have learn from this project is the importance of planning. Though i had some grudges about my group leader being very on initially, i realised that it is really good to do things in advance, like today. One cannot assume that printing of the report will be straight forward and fast. There are always some unexpected problems.

Most of my friends are still pia-ing in school. A security guard unbelievably came to chase us out at around 12.10 midnight. But luckily for my classmates, the first few clusters are still available to use.

French
Failed my French final test. Sianz... Really sianz, cause given the time, i will definitely put in more efforts in my French. Really did not expect this sem to be that busy...... Had a voice conversation with BS member, Kiat An, who is in France, Paris now. Really glad he agreed to be my conversation partner. I need practises badly... In that short 15 mins, with his patient explanation, i felt that i had improved! Hope that he can find more time to practise with me. Anyway hope overall i can still pass my French, cause i dun want to get an 'U' in my transcript!

Bahasa
Met Yessy, Davis and Frisca at engin canteen today. wanted to converse in Bahasa but realised that i can't do it anymore. Wah, jialat, just 1 sem onli. Language is really something you must practise often...

Dr Tong
Was doing my work in E2 just now when suddenly, suey lein msn me and commented: Wah, is Dr Tong your brother? Both of you look sooo alike.
........
I dunno why is it that the girls always find that both of us are alike. I rem our class girls commented on that afew year ago, Yeeli too, and now my juniors also say that ....... But i must say that we share some resemblance after seeing a photo of myself without specs...

Starting to feel the pressure. Who and who got what jobs and what interviews liao... Wonder how my future gonna be......

Je n'ai pas étudié pour l'essai d'aujourd'hui

2006-03-23T16:20:00.000+08:00

A week of work.

Monday - deadline to submit HR project, but actually we were more or less done since some time ago. Good working experience with my classmates. Went to study for CN4231 test with Yongming at YIH. Went to seek consultation with the Prof too for the test. We spent 45 mins discussing work, and 1 hr chatting. I am amazed at how i can chat so much with my Prof, wahaha. Still remember that 2 sem ago when i took his other module, i din like him, cos he locked me out of the tutorial room. And his face always look so stern, din noe he can be so chatty too :)

Tuesday - CN4231 test. Died, i was very well-prepared for the mathematics i dare say but did not touch on qualitative at all. Turns out half-half. Out of 40, got 10 marks were on a table of characteristics found in the notes, which i did not even managed to put 1 point correctly. The mathematics components were no sweat to me.

Wednesday - stayed till 11 pm in school to rush my Design II report due next thurs. Die liao, haven really start yet.

Thursday - woke up unwillingly at 6 plus for my 8am lesson - FRench. Realised with a sudden shock that i have a quiz for my FRench today. I did NOT study at all. Was wondering whether to get MC or what, when i finally decide to go to school, and just do it. Luckily for me, all those materials i hurriedly studied on the bus on the way to school were useful. And i think i can pass...

Now taking a break while still working on my Design II report. I think most of the engin comps were hogged by chem eng students doing Design modules.

A simple poster

2006-03-16T01:32:00.000+08:00

Someone Else Will Do It

2006-03-15T00:54:00.000+08:00

Had not play soccer for close to 2 months liao. My 2 friends who have been doing the organising for so many years suddenly quit organising, because they say we are a group of selfish people who only wants to play and don't want to organise (sounds like what some NUSBS seniors might say just before AGM, haha...). I asked tohle on msn on friday night, as to why not organising anymore, he said

"Wong, we need someone man enough to take over. Can you be the one?"

Afterwhich i just act blur and change topic, haha...

Finally someone else organised for us on sunday, though it was quite screwed up, we played with 8 pple most of the time. And if not for the fact I was with them on saturday night (playing CS), I wouldn't have known...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Today received my HR essay test, but have to return to the tutor straight after that. She did not indicate the score although from my position, i can see everyone's score on the paper she was holding. I got 6 out of 10. Most pple will think that is sucky but seriously speaking, average is like 6 to 7 and my test was sooo screw up that i was prepared to fail the test, so for me i am very happy liao. I wrote really really very little, beyond the imagination of most people. Luckily for me, she emphasize more on approach and quality, and in the long comment she put, she said, gd examples, gd focus, etc. She only got 1 problem with my essay and that is the length. She then goes into how i should balance b/w planning and writing and do time management etc... So it din turn up that bad afterall. That's a relieve, after just failing my mid-term for FrenchII.

FYP Poster Day

2006-03-11T00:27:00.000+08:00

My FYP Poster

2006-03-04T17:12:00.000+08:00

My 'I' is getting smaller

2006-03-01T23:15:00.000+08:00

What a demoralising week it has been. My poster was not that well-receive, gotta make some changes. My HR test was like shit. Really shit. I have a phobia of writing essay one, and as expected, i'm really done for...

Today french oral was even worse. Awkward to say the least. I was the scheduled last one, but while i was waiting outside the room at 1.55pm, the next lesson tutor went in to ask my tutor if there are anymore, and she said 'No more, that's the last one', pointing to the guy inside. I quickly exclaimed that I thought I was the last one, she said she dunno that i'm still in her class since i have missed her last 2 lessons... Haiz...

Then i gotta sit in the class with other students inside, and prepared for my question. I thought it read '1 person only', so i describe my mum. But when i ran out of things to say, she suddenly asked about my dad. I was stunned, n at a lost of what to say, in the end i just told her that my dad has passed away liao, and the atmosphere became very very awkward. I can tell she was embarassed for asking. Anyway she prompt me to describe about my siblings but my mind was really blank liao (cos i thought the question only says to describe 1 person) . I can't even remember between soeur/frere, which is brother which is sister. In the end she has to prompt me about their age, and i took a really long time to recall their age in french, and phrasing it correctly. In the end she just said ok, that's all. really jialat... -_-'

I think i'm not even french one standard, in terms of speaking.....

My Voice

2006-02-21T16:58:00.000+08:00

At last, my voice is returning. Yesterday was still quite bad, probably becos

1. Woke up at 7 plus to bring my mum to school for the checkup. I choose the executive package (which cost another $120 besides the $7 basic cost) plus the optional test for Ovarian cancer (which costs another $28). A young lady, probably mid-twenties was screaming during the draw blood station, which made me stiffled my giggles. I mean my mum was scared, but not to the extend of screaming, hahaha

2. Had breakfast with my mum at the science canteen. She stopped at the claypot stall, wanted to nudge her on cos i dun have a good impression of that stall, but decided to let her chose for herself. She went for the pig liver soup cos she say good to make up for the lost blood, haha...

3. Stayed in school till 1pm for the Design Group meeting. Again... i'm really getting sick of design and hysys. Maybe i'm not cut out to be an engineer. Or maybe it is the people. I think an important factor is the people.If dun have 'mo-qi' it is torturous to spent so much time together working on the thing.

4. 2pm went for the HR project group discussion with wenyan, xianming and yongming. Although it was more than 2 hours , and they always digress with jokes and irrelevant stuff, i enjoyed the discussion much better... Anyway realised Yongming and xianming also sick, yongming more than a week liao, same as me. Our voice all jialat one...

Watched the Campus Superstar yesterday. The 翻身赛, i thought, should choose songs which are relatively easy to sing, to show your strength, but apparently i feel that the songs they all choose were difficult. Especially this girl who sang 丝路, which is one of the most difficult song i think to sing live... I think the judges realised this, one gave her 7, another 6.5 but the third is so off and gave only 5. In the end a tomboyish-looking girl got in...

Ms Sylvia

2006-02-21T16:37:00.000+08:00

She was my Dharma Class teacher during the only official Dharma class i have ever took before. She taught the Dharma section while another guy taught Abhidharma. At that time i can remember the 3 of us (me, gillian and katrine) felt that it is a bad thing, since she is so good, and the guy is quite bad (i mean in terms of teaching) and Abhidharma is much more difficult.

Went for BF Dharma talk on sunday, by Ms Sylvia, cos Hidayat notified me and said that the topic is interesting. Was very suprise to hear this name again though. Argh, Bf really knows how to get good people in their activities. Anyway I went because of the speaker and true enough, it was a very good talk. The topic, "What is Dharma, what is non-Dharma", i expected her to tackle the traditions in Buddhism, but instead she approached it from the characteristics of the Dharma. She is humorous, her talk was supplemented with good references, and clear. she gave a summary at the end of each major sections. I asked Hidayat why din we get her for DC. He said a waste of resources since DC only 5 pple turn up... -_-'

Jataka Stories

2006-02-19T02:11:00.000+08:00

The rooms in my house have a stupid design, where there is a window ledge inwards that eats into yr room space and make your room much smaller than it should be. However, being a lazy person, especially since recently i was extremely busy, i simply just anyhow put my stuffs on that ledge.

Recently, have to share my comp with my sis, who's comp was down, so i just sat on my bed and grab the nearest book which i can find on the ledge, which is the Jataka stories. Not bad, though the stories were quite unbelievable at times, the morals were simple and true.

"Beware of the man whose heart is gripped by panic and fear. What he can do out of fear is more dangerous than what scared him in the first place."

A Mexican Friend

2006-02-03T00:06:00.000+08:00

Had a long project discussion today. actually not suppose to be that long but this Indian group mate lady, she keep digressing and chatting with the Mexican friend, and Yong Ming, my classmate left early today, so it was really inefficieny. Then when finally i thought it was over, and i suggest having dinner at PGP with the Mexican friend, once we step into PGP, there was like foreigner everywhere and he seems to know all of them, Australian, British, Maritius, French, etc etc... Finally when we can eat, most of the stalls were closed... ~_~

Anyway this Mexican friend, his name is Luis Orozco Aragon, he is quite interested in Chinese culture, and even Buddhism, and we had some discussion, some real discussion, unlike those evangelist type of discussion typical of the Christians community in Singapore...Finally when i left PGP, it was after 10.30pm...

And i had lesson at 8am today! My french test. Argh, to think that i had prepared for my presentation on Zinedine Zidane, she didn't ask me to present today, say no time, next week then present. The test is jialat, cos the listening comprehension is really cannot catch, just tikam the MCQs all the way... and the written test, ask stupid questions like locate PAris and NAntes on the map of France... -_-' Luckily i'm S/U-ing...

A bit busy nowadays...

2006-01-24T22:42:00.000+08:00

Dunno why this semester seem so shiong... 5 modules but can feel that it is one of my more tough semester... Compared to last sem, it is hell lot of a difference. That is also one of the reason why i'm not taking an extra module this sem to fulfill my minor. Though it might be wasted, I have decided to keep to my original plan of kicking up a big fuss when the time comes, cos i don't want to drop my French.

This time round we have a very different French teacher. She places more emphasis on speaking and listening to dialogues (which i feel is good) and i found myslef very inadequate. I barely can follow the lessons, and i must put in a little effort i guess, else I might really get a U for the module...

At least i got my weekly soccer to keep me healthy every week. Recently i jio a classmate from my physiology class last sem, who lived at tanah merah, to join us. Erm, since this is my blog, i shall be very frank. He is full of energy and running, but his style is not suitable to play in a street soccer setting. The first session most of the time he just take the ball and chiong and nvr look for better alternatives. Was a bit exasperated wif him that time. But at least he is very dedicated and always track back to win back the ball he lost.

The sunday that had just passed, he played better, maybe can get use liao (since he is more used to playing field soccer). Me too, after getting so much zeros in the ranking list, this week i had 3 assists and 2 goals! Wah, very happy, wahahha... All my 3 assists were to Brian. His positioning, as sean commented, is 20/20, and i agree. When i have the ball, and i look up, i always found him in a good position to pass the ball to...

NUS Engineering admin sucks

2006-01-19T22:18:00.000+08:00

Was very angry today at the Division of Bioengineering. It is an absolutely crappy department. Even worse than my Chemical Engineering Department. My friend got troubled over this issue cause he learned from his friends, who are taking minor in Bioengineering (like me) that we have to fulfil 24 MCs instead of the 6 modules requirement as was the requirement when we took up the minor. He went to email the Bio-dept and got a confirmation that regardless of when u take up the minor, you have to fulfil 24MCs NOW. That is real silly, and I was wondering why he should be worried (cos we went by the rule and did 6 modules worth 22 MCs). Obviously the rule applys to those who appy for the minor this academic year, and not for us who applied 2 years ago. Moreover they did NOT inform us AT ALL of this new ruling and it would be silly to expect us to cram 1 more module for them at our last and only semester just because they feel like changing the ruling.

It is stated clearly in their site
http://www.bioeng.nus.edu.sg/edu/ugrad/minor.htm

Requirements (Applicable to students who registered for the Minor in AY05/06)
To satisfy the Minor in Bioengineering, the students are required to to fulfill at least 24 MCs and ..................

Requirements (Applicable to students who registered for the Minor before AY05/06)
To satisfy the Minor in Bioengineering, the student must read, outside their Major:
Compulsory Multidisciplinary Module BN1901 Principles of Bioengineering (4 MCs) and
3 out of the 15 Multidisciplinary Modules (see Table 3.6). Prerequisites for the LSM modules are waived for all students taking the Minor in Bioengineering except for LSM1401.
a minimum of another 2 Engineering Elective Modules from the following list of electives offered in the Faculty of Engineering

So i was wondering why he even bother to get work up over the issue. However i was more than convinced, from the emails he forwarded me that they really intend not to give us our minor if we did not fulfill 24 MCs given the fact the our department officer spoke to their head and forward us the email.

My goodness, i cannot believe that i am stuck in this silly mess of NUS. I am not going to give in, and right till now, they did not inform us in writing. However the bad news is those few people i know that are taking the minor, my friend decide to take 1 more module just in case, another has 1 more sem left, the other 2 person has taken an extra module by mistake so it did not affect them at all. I will be alone in the situation, but at that moment if they really won't give me my minor, I m sure to kick it up real big (after i got my degree of course). I have save the webpage for reference already.

2006-01-15T01:24:00.000+08:00

Your Birthdate: January 7

You are an island. You don't need anyone else to make you happy.
And though you see yourself as a loner, people are drawn to you.
Deep and sensitive, you tend to impress others with your insights.
You also tend to be psychic - so listen to that inner voice!

Your strength: Your self sufficiency

Your weakness: You despise authority

Your power color: Maroon

Your power symbol: Hammer

Your power month: July

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Not telling anyone

2006-01-12T18:38:00.000+08:00

Went to see the YIH doctor today, after much thought... Am coughing quite badly now, with sore throat all that. Had 2 hrs break today, so went to see the doc. Was quite nervous while waiting for my turn. Wonder how come I always got the same doctor, don't really like him, so hopefully this time can get another one.

To my dismay, it was the same doctor but i told myself so be it. I went in and after telling him about the normal problem, I decided that the matter is too serious to keep to myself and finally told the doctor about it. He said it is very unusual for guy to get this problem and it can be symptom for many major problem like cancer etc and by sop, he must referred me for full checkup. After much dilly dallying staring at each other, i ask for his opinion and he say he leave it to my decision, finally it was decided to do the simple test first, see result how. Went to did it and luckily, it was perfectly normal.

As again, he looked at me and recommend a full check up, as i was pondering, he mentioned that luckily it only happen once (actually it was twice but i told him once) and he will check me again in a mth time and that if he refer me, it will be very ex. Then i told him if this symptom(s) occur again, i will go to polyclinic to get the referral. So the thing is settled for now...

Has been bothering me since the thing happen a few days ago. Really glad that simple test is negative. At least i feel much better telling someone about it. However i was really shocked by the incident. And it make me really worried about my life. Life is short, only when you realised it...

Birthday Wishes & Gifts

2006-01-11T03:10:00.000+08:00

Thanks so much for the gifts and well wishes! I do not have much cake celebration in the past, my 21st being the first, so this is my fifth cake celebration at our SRC, thanks to Kimberly and company. It was really a surprise for me, as in I wasn't expecting anyone of them to remember...
Would like to jot down some of the gifts for memorial sake:
1. Birthday Cake
2. Earphones
3. Nike bag (from adik, gor, wenyan & company)
4. Topman's voucher (from 27th MC)
5. Handphone Ornament - a mini prayer wheel (from Lirong & Merwin)
6. Some treats

Recalling, I think i'm really fortunate. I have been receiving quite a no of good gifts all these yrs since i have joined BS. The swimming trunk from 25th MC 2 yrs ago, the soccer boot last yr (still my fav gift of all time. Sooo useful!!!) and the bag this yr. Most of my bags all koyak oledi. However this Nike does look pretty expensive; a bit don't bear to bring it out to use....

Online Msn
Onelife: Happy 25th Birthday Abang aka Siling aka Zeathereal! Semoga Abang bahagia&baik selalu!
Dani: Sang and recorded a birthday song! (wahaha, touched. Save the file but promise him wun show anyone else, haha)
Aisee: happy birthday, may all ur dreams come true
Sabrina: Happy Birthday! May you be well and happy!
Pearlyn: happy 25th birthday! may all yr wishes come true this yr
Peiwen: happy birthday
Shaowei: happy birthday
Kwek: happy birthday
Riki: happy Burpday to Zea
Ah Neh: Happy bdae man
Gillian: happy bday
Om: Happy Birthday!
WJ:
Pak Wing:
SEAN:
ANG:

SMS
WeiYang: yoz. happy birthday to u! stay healthy n happy always :)
Aisee: Surprise! i am coming to say Happy Bday! Adik from Segamat. Smile
Unknown(984524XX): happy birthday, shwei lin
Sandra: Type out the birthday song... 25yr old liao. REalli old liao haha big bro. i'm onli 21 n 8daes old..
Om: May your 25th yr of life be fully brightened up by e Buddha light.Stay healthy and get a great job.
Kimberly: Happy Birthday! Enjoy your day! May u be well and happy always!
Sean: Happy Birthday..
Kin Song: Hi honey. Happy Birthday. (Don't be so moved. I happened to see Friendster birthday reminder, that's why I remember)
ZIJING: Hey happy BDAY no present Haha
Alex: Happy birthday to u

Ecards
Dani: hello sayang!!! here to wish you 25th birthday!(i din forget it this time ah). hoping that you will have lots of b'day joy on ur day and may u find lots of happiness and success in the coming year.. Cheers

Belated
Huixian: Happy belated birthday Siling! WIshing you good health, happiness and success.. :p
Davis

Jialat, my hp got a lot of sms recently, memory was full. Hope that no sms din get thru.. :'(

Where I was born

2006-01-09T02:44:00.000+08:00

It is certainly feels good to talk to people whom know the place you are talking about. The big malaysian group that came for the Dharmacamp, quite a number of them know where Jementah and Segamat is, that is certainly nice. Cos many malaysians i know, they are from around JB itself so they do not know about the more ulu part of Johore. And for people who don't know, Johore is a state for goodness sake, and not just about JB!

Actually to be honest, though I was born in Jementah and had lived there till I was 4 years old, I do not know the geographical location of the place and its surrounding. I just know that it is near Segamat, where my family will usually go if we went back to Malaysia. And I also know there are mountains surrounding the area, and people like to go there for trekking ones. Just that i din know that the mountains they are referring to one of them is actually Mt Ophir. It is so near my hometown. Wah, next time if anyone goes there for trekking please jio me along! I so badly want to visit my hometown...

I have no idea how come i am missing that place so much though... It is really a small town and people are having simple lifestyle. Mabbe it is precisely such lifestyle that are appealing to city-dwellers like us? For those people that have been to Sayalay Dipankara last 2 retreats, the town is something like Bekok, except that it din have the railroad running through it. Perhaps the town is even smaller than Bekok...

I located Jementah using the Google Earth software, which is a very powerful software. I can even see the buildings, not symbols, from the satellite pictures, even my place swimming pool!!! After knowing Mt Ophir is so near, I pester my mum to tell me more about the place. She told me that near Jementah, there is this nice and beautiful mountain, where people often visit. There is a very nice waterfall and they often go there and picnic one. I was almost in tears when i heard this. SO nice!!! Muz visit!!! (I think she is describing Mt Ophir cos the description I read abt the mountain is that there are a lot of pools and waterfalls...)

Silver, and lost in bus AGAIN!!

2006-01-06T01:32:00.000+08:00

Had my 3rd try for IPPT this year today (yeah, the window gonna close in 1 day time). Tomorrow is a Friday, and no IPPTs are conducted on Friday, so today is theorectically my last day to try to get Silver, and get my $200 for my IPPT window this year. Sigh, decided to make my way to Maju camp, which is freaking far away, for the test, instead of the much nearer Bedok camp. I don't think i will ever go back to Bedok to take my IPPT.

2 reasons:
1. I suspect the standing broad jump mat at Maju is slightly shorter. And the manual system means you can 'puay' wif them to let you jump more times, unlike at Bedok. I jump 216 at Bedok camp while i jumped more than 243 (and 1 jump only somemore!). Where does the extra 30cm comes from? Haha...

2. 2.4km run is shorter. Wenyan and Justin said they confirm it is shorter, but actually I can't really feel the difference. Yeah, i ran a much better timing of 11.21 mins today, compared to 12.10 mins at bedok camp, but i dun think the evidence is conclusive. This is because though i did not specifically train for this IPPT (only 2 days ago i decided to take, cos I feel I will need the money), I had played a lot of soccer recently, and I felt that I had definitely improved in my stamina and running. However I think what the conducting PTI said is true, that it is definitely shorter if you know how to cut corners correctly. And besides that, after the run, I spotted another obvious way to cut distance, without breaking the rules. For those interested to know can msn me, i think can cut at least a few seconds each round.

Today's weather was horrible, 忽热忽冷... Really jialat, was caught in the intermittent rain, and had to wait for the rain to stop b4 I could take the 2.4km. However when the rain did stop, the sun came out, and it was warm again. B4 that i felt cold. Mabbe that is why i'm feeling so sick now. Again! After that, no time to bathe, no time to help my sister too, and rushed to meet my friends in Tampines. Took the wrong bus somemore, in the sense i dunno where to alight, and waited for it to take me to wunderland again...

Summary of results:
Sit Up: 40 (5)
Broad Jump: 243 cm (5)
Chin Up: 10 (4)
Shuttle Run: 9.8 sec (5)
2.4 km Run: 11.21 mins (3)

Total points: 22/25

Was given a KTV treat today, 6 guys and 1 girl. Quite fun except was feeling sick and no mood to sing... But still grateful for the treat... Oh yah, also got another gift liao from WK yesterday, a pair of Philip earphones. Thanks...

Here pain there pain

2005-12-25T17:22:00.000+08:00

Spent the Christmas eve with my secondary school friends again.

Went to play soccer in the morning, but had lousy day. Woke up very late, cos came back late that night, and they had shifted the timing to 8am, so i missed a lot of playing time. But nevertheless I think my spirit was pretty good and ran a lot. Was quite enjoying myself till it start to rain, and everyone ran for shelter and after which, i forgot to warm down.

Afternoon around 4.30, we met at city hall mrt and started making our way to suntec, scrutinizing the food and prices there. Our original plan, which was fish & co, was scrapped immeditately cos the cheapest meal there is $30 nett. That's crazy. We went to Siam's kitchen in the end. Buffet for $16 nett, and add $2 for free-flow of drinks. And the service is good. Food was ok.So had an enjoyable dinner.

After which we spent some time in the arcade, before our show (Narnia) starts at 8pm. They played that shooting war game. Wanted to join them but one rifle was down, so only 3 people can play. As usual, Guangxiang was the last one standing, for along time after everyone else has KO liao. The movie was quite good (at least to me), although i agree with them the battle is sort of sucky...

After the movie was another period of dilly dally, with sean insisting on walking the Orchard road every christmas, while others were deciding on where to do the customary gift exchange. Finally it was decided to be Esplanade and we make our way there. However, in the end, we stopped at the big open area between Marina Square and esplanade and did our gift exchange. The system this year: each present was label with a poker card, as some numbers need to be re-used, we use both colors and numbers to indicate the present. And then we just took a card each. 17 presents this year, and the strangest gift this yr is from Zijing again. A filmsy looking rat toy. But i think it is ok lah, generally no sucky stuffs for this year. No cabbage, cooking pans, chinese calendar, and no newspaper (i can't think of any worse gift than that). I got a game set, something like monopoly i think. Dunno what to do with it. Anybody wants?

Finally, we make our way back to the hotel. Only 12 people stayed. Actually i felt quite left out initially, cos I was one of those who went back early, 2 couples plus another friend. Six of us. Nothing to do. I stayed so that can help to share the cost, think it is not easy organising this annual gathering. However my mood lifted when everyone was back and they played some games, where the loser will to drink connoctions. I din of course, they were all strong alcholic stuffs, no way i could take them w/o knocking out. And of cos, it is more to the precept reason. In the end found out i had to pay quite a lot, cos they have a policy of complimentary staying for the partners (to encourage more girls to stay overnight) so only 9 of us sharing. :s

The three couples had the luxury of the bed b blanket (no choice! I was freezing!) while the rest of us squeeze on the lower bed and the floor. My space was really tiny and I almost can't sleep at all. Not to mention my body was aching after soccer. Now my body is aching all over. Dukkha

Without expectations

2005-12-24T01:01:00.000+08:00

'Merry Christmas', supposedly a well-acclaimed foreign language film, is good. Boon Whye said it is a french film and jio our french class classmates along to watch at cineleisure, but actually, it is a triple language film. Actually dunno the title and the type of movie (i had thought it is just another comedy like the Taxis series i have watched, the only other french films i saw before) and just went to watch with them. Maybe because i din expect anything of the film, i enjoyed and was totally absorbed in the film.

It is a war film. The three countries involved were Scotland, France (two of them are allies) and Germany. So the Scottish spoke English, French spoke French and Germans spoke German. B/w French and Germans, they spoke mostly French. The three countries took up position at this frontline near France (I think). And a lot of hostilities. The scene started with each country kids being made to recite bad things about the enemy, like they are not real humans, its justified to kill everyone, including children and women etc...

Gist of the story: A German private soldier, a very famous singer, gets a night off the war front on christmas eve, due to his very longing wife, equally famous singer, pulling strings. Together they performed for the prince of Germany. However, he told his wife he have to get back to sing for his comrades. And together, they went back to the frontline (Sneaked back actually). Their comrades were of course surprise and the guy broke into christmas carol, Silent Night. Before this the Scottish were alreading blowing their musical instruments. Suddenly, the Scottish were heard playing the music of the song, Silent Night. Touched, the singer step out of the trench and sing so that his voice could be projected to them too. Absolutely shocked by his actions, the rest wer all trying to get him back down. The funny part is when he finished, cheers and clappings were heard from the Scottish side, and when the Germans went up to look, the Scottish soldiers were all sitting along their trenches, at the top. really a touching side. The singer then walk over the frontline to somewhere middle b/w them and .......

Anyway the important thing is, the French lieutenant, together with the Scottish and German counterpart, agreed to call for a truce just that night, and soon everyone was came out and drop their weapons and huddle together. The next day, still some uneasy tension, since the truce was over, but a digging sound could be heard and someone was trying to bury his brother and the three leaders met up again, to discuss the issue of handling the dead, and so everyone was buried, and the only priest among the soldiers, a Scottish, gave his blessings. Soon everyone was together again, even playing games like soccer.

Then next, the German leader walk over to the French and Scottish side and told his counterparts that the Germans artilleries will bomb in 10 mins. It is safer to come over to their trenches (everyone in the cinema was laughing loudly but to me it is really beautiful). And more funny conversation about how accurate the bombings were, and how a French lament that they will have to dig all over again... After the bombings were over, the French leader replied that their countries will soon replied with artilleries too,and so they shld go over too.

The ending is a sad one. Of course the war continued, but those few hundred men were disgraced in their own countries and being given all sort of label and punishment. Some meaningful conversation took place here, like the priest was screwed by his higher authority and said and did something which really disgust me. The French commander was screwed too but he rebuked that he felt much more with those Germans on the other side, than those that had give the orders about.

Finally the film was dedicated to those soldiers who had participated in such truce (they had a term for it) in all parts of the World during World War I during Christmas eve. Anyway think i really like the film, haha. It gives a realistic view of the soldiers (i think usually Germans were more badly protrayed). Its main principle is something which i had just read about in 'The Four Noble Truth' by Ajahn Sumedho. Plus you get to listen to French, German and some English. I confirm will get the VCD or DVD, if it comes out.

Gifts exchange

2005-12-21T22:53:00.000+08:00

Haben joined my secondary school friends in their annual christmas celebration for a long time. The past two years I always went for Sayalay's retreat. This year, although a bit green eye that a lot of them got to go for her retreat, i have only myself to blame for not being able to go to her retreat. I wanted to go for Sayadaw's one but after much hesitation, in the end nvr go, and of cos i was way too late to register for the more popular Sayalay's retreat...

Back to the celebration. Usually they will walk Orchard Road on the eve. This year, much to my relieve, a lot of people complaint they don't want to squeeze with the crowd so the plan was adjusted to dinner, then movie, then stay @ hotel and it's 'daidee' again. They are all gambling kings, maybe that's why i don't feel a part of them anymore. But no matter what, still long time friends.

I decided to spend more efforts in preparing for the gifts exchange this year. I will almost always grab chocalates @ the last min, haha. This is because i know mine will not be the worst gift. My friends are all very boliao one and can really think of ultra boliao gifts. Example of such presents include newspaper, cabbage (yes, cabbage), big mac burger, etc... Decided on some necessity items. Personally i found them quite useful to bring along on trips like chalet or camps. Oh ya, the budget is $5 this year. I fall short a bit with the package i bought, so decided to top it up with an big pack of mentos, hoping that the person will share, lol...

Oh yah, i was in low spirits today, especially since today sales was extremely bad, but still glad to see Vincent Soh, who surprised me. I'm quite sure he din know I would be around today. Maybe he had hope to catch my sis but was disappointed to see me instead. Haha...

被骂

2005-12-19T22:49:00.000+08:00

Kena screwed by a customer just now. Not my fault but for the sake of keeping this regular customer, have to say it is my fault, that I forgot and so on... Sigh, only did I got screwed by him for around 15mins, I blatantly lie to get myself screwed, so that mean breaking the precept. Sianz......

Actually I wasn't really angry, cos i tried to tell myself that he must have a reason for being so angry, like mabbe he can only take food w/o sugar, and his dinner is that porridge which i had sold away. Was a bit indignant that I have to carry the blame for my sis who had went off to her friend wedding dinner, but I reason that it would be better that I say it was my fault, cos i'm just helping out.

So i stood there like an idiot and let him rain insults (some pretty hurting) like 长这么大了，没有脑的啊? All the other stalls people came over after that to kapo, and surprising I was pretty cool about it and told them it was our fault afterall, although i think his scolding got too personal... Good chance to practise my Brahma Vihara...

Actually, WK ask me if the person is bigger size than me etc that he dare to scold like that. The answer is no, he is more like a lor-soh auntie to me. But i agree that the fact that he dare to scold me like that means i look good to bully type? lol. 人善被人欺. Whatever...

时间

2005-12-19T01:14:00.000+08:00

词：Zeathereal/DJ 锋
曲：Zeathereal

Verse
在这寒冷的冬天站在月台最端点雪像针刺痛我的心扉
回忆起我们从前兩人天真无邪地漫步在樱花盛开的街
望着模糊的世界思念有如大海般无际无边地将我吞沒
想起分手那天你双手的微温至今仍让我思念

Pre-Chorus
听见你在呐喊叫我要勇敢
我含泪回应说珍重

Chorus
啸声响起列车即将要离去远去的身影停留在彼此的心
无法掌控的命运仿佛把我们卷入永无止尽的悲剧
多年后当我再回返城市里熟悉的画面唤醒沉睡了的心
如果能让时间停留在海枯石烂的心那有多美丽

Translation (by DJ 锋 aka Puay Hong aka Bae Yong Jun)

Standing at the edge of the balcony in the cold winter, snow penetrated my heart like sharp needles.
Remembering the last time when we were still young and innocent, we strolled along the pavement where the Sakura flowers blossomed.
Looking at this vague world now, resembling a vast ocean, reminiscences of those happy times we had, boundlessly flooding my mind.
Recalling the day when we parted, the warmth of your hand still lingers in my mind.

I heard you cried, “Please stay strong!”
I held back my tears and replied, “Take care!”

The train whistled, indicating it’s time to leave. The silhouette of our backs will always be imprinted in each other’s heart.
The destiny we couldn’t control, forced us to an eternal tragedy.
I returned back to the city many years later. Familiar surroundings awakened my long sleeping heart.
If only time could stop at the instance; when our love is everlasting for each other, how nice would it be?

A day like the past

2005-12-17T22:10:00.000+08:00

The above photo was taken 6 months ago. The 2nd person from the left is Dr Raymond Ng. At his newly bought house in AMK (newly wed too). Seeing this reminded me of how i was very kua-zhang and msg him while i was sick sometime ago. Now think back quite embarrassing, but was quite touch by his concern though...

Today was a day like the holidays of the past. Nothing to do. Just slept and stone the day away. Until i went for meditation and accidentally hurt someone feelings (i think...)

Mes amis (my friends)

2005-12-17T00:53:00.000+08:00

Thought this was pretty funny so decided to put down the conversation.

Zeathereal : merci beaucoup mon ami! (means thank you very much my friend)
onelife : no problema de amis masmies! (suppose to mean not a problem my friend. correct one should be 'pas de probléme mon ami' )

Since that time i used the sentence 'pas de probléme mes amis' to him, he has been using broken up version of this sentence to reply whenever i said 'merci' but none as funny as the above.. All the 'ma-mees'! ahahahha

Yet more bad news today at Finger Food Street. The korean guy finally decided to end it. I feel so sad for him, all his efforts and money. Luckily he still have the restaurant nearby, which seems to be doing quite well. Counting the number of stalls left, gasp, only left 10! More than half have evacuate liao. From what i gather yesterday, the tenants side of the story, here is what the management have done wrong:

1. Rent too high. Despite many joint efforts by the stalls to petition for reduction by substantial amt, only 10% temporary reduction was given. It is not a rationale decision to me because starting up is the most difficult time for businesses, if they should quit, the whole place will look empty which will only make business worse.

2. Further petition was only heeded when things got to the stage beyond remedy. Most of the tenants got too du lan with the management and left one by one. Even then, only a further 10% reduction was given. Looking at the situation today, i felt quite sad. So many empty stalls.

Of course maybe the management side have some problems, but no doubt i felt the relationship and confidence with their tenants could have been much better.

Back to Dharmacamp. Suddenly wanted to blog about this final yr gal call jiahui. I kept staring at her, cos i found her resemblance to peiwen uncanny. Wonder if i have stared too much and create a bad impression, cos i din speak to her at all till towards the end of the camp. Tried to ask Ziyi about her name, using look like peiwen as my description. But obviously she didn't agree with the resemblance, cos she dunno who am i referring to. So i thought i was alone until finale night when i realise almost everyone who had gone for CEP agreed with me that she looked very much like peiwen. Except she is slightly prettier! (hope peiwen don't ever get to read my blog)

I have known many jiahui(s), and all of them have similar characters. Those of strong strong type. Hmmm, i wonder why....

PS: Thanx SW for asking abt the problem. Think you will not have known anyway especially since you are not a Buddhist. So spare you the long story...

Back from camp

2005-12-16T14:52:00.000+08:00

So much to update after such a long time, but din have the mood to do it earlier.

I knew quite a number of people who had felt they have really benefitted a lot from the camp. Like Hendra. _/\_ Sadhu x 3. Felt happy for them. Think the quality of the Dharma talks and Meditation were good. Thumbs up for the organisers.

Something happen on the finale night evening which affected my whole mood for the camp. Something which i can't even blog about it cos i dunno how private my blog is... Though we have all agreed to hold the matter until they consult venerable again, on my part, i'm still escaping direct confrontation, because i know i will break the precept if i face the situation now.

Went back home, my mum is obsessed with the issue again and she took some ridiculous measures. After giving her a massage i told her nothing is more serious than 心病. Luckily her headache has somehow subside now, after acupuncture, else i was thinking of bringing her to find a Ven Chun Hui, whom i think she will be able to relate better. No more bringing my mum to theravadan monks, even though i'm towards theravada.

Yesterday, whilst looking after my sis stall, one previous stallholder came and hand out tim sum (a lot!) for us to eat. Delicious! And from our conversation i knew more about the situation and management issues at the Finger Food Street. Kinda of nice the people there can bond so well...

Today, had a talk with chun kiang after seeing his msn nick. He got posted to Combat Medic. But i think i got too excited and ramble non stop about what to expect, I/V, etc... He did not even know what is I/V, poor guy. That is the nightmare of all medics.

One leg in

2005-12-09T01:20:00.000+08:00

'Thanks' to shaowei for taking this shot while i was stressfully memorising my anatomy stuffs... Thanks to him, boon whye and francis though, had quite an enjoyable study period at Law Library. Kinda strange that i'm actually quite close to my french classmates, instead of joining BS pple for studying... Actually already have the feeling i will miss studying for exam, the campus, the people, everything... hmmm...

Can't believe i went to pester Mui Hwee at the request of SW. He wanted her msn and after thickening my skin to go and ask her for her permission, he din dare to add her! ahahaha.

Yesterday we had the games trial and i had a lot of fun being just helping out in the camp instead of doing the planning. Its like what om (w/o the -ve connotation, cos i'm actually more uncle than u, in terms of outlook i think) say, chap one kar in...

So think i would have enjoyed myself more if i had join NUSBS during my yr1 and just help out here and there, instead of jumping straight into 2 yrs of committee work...

Anyway really like some of the photos i took during the trial games.

The above was taken by Pak Wing. Not bad, think he will make a much better cameraman than me. Realised a few things, Robby is always posing, whenever he caught me aiming with the camera. Kwek always get caught by me in a not so nice pose, Guan Liang is quite photogenic, the girls usually just try to act normal. Although Yessy also like to pose, haha...

And finally, the group photos

Kevin will come for some part of the camp afterall so i actually do not really need to worry, since i probably will not have much chance of being a lone photographer, most of the time. Since there is also Yeeling. Kinda grateful that Kevin often help out during my time in charge. His pictures are great!!!

Playing ard with my (sister's) camera

2005-12-06T22:51:00.000+08:00

Its actually quite an old camera, with only 3.2 Megapixels (considering handphones can give you 2 MP easily nowadays!). After being appointed cameraman to Dharmacamp, i just sort of find out more about this old camera on the internet and read up on how to use some of the manual settings it offered. Think my sis got a lot of photography stuffs which she din touched at all. Not a strange thing since she was from Mass Communication when she was in NTU. Found a good and tall tripod. Found some materials on photography too... So now i know how to change the exposure settings and the aperture settings, and some default mode like sports or night or scenic or portrait.

Today tried out the camera whilst i was waiting for the bus.

The above was taken using the old trick of using a large aperture, such that the near objects are clear while the background are blurred. Often found in portrait photos. Tooo bad i don't have beautiful flowers to try and i also paiseh the pple at the busstop are looking at me...

The photos i took at the Dharmacamp meeting was an absolute disaster. Low bat means i can't use flash, which combine with the poor lighting conditions (cum the fact that i must have very steady hands under such conditions), the photos were awful... Tried to played with the exposure after i had thought the photos were too bright (from the camera lcd) BUT actually it was just nice, as seen from below. Regretted changing the settings...

The link for the photo is http://photobucket.com/albums/a74/autumntree/

Anyway managed to squeeze some battery life out of camera to allow me to capture 5 photos of Foo Hai to be used in the camp booklet.

Selling stuffs again

2005-12-01T01:29:00.000+08:00

Help my sister today at her stall. Was actually a bit irritated when she told me to call out to customers to promote the food. Because I don't really think that will help much. But i must admit it is more due to that I pretty uncomfortable doing that. What i do is I will just talk to them a bit when they stop to look at the stuffs, and not really called out to every passer-by. There is this new korean stall next to my sis stall. Today the korean guy brought his gf and her brother and the brother gf (haha) to the stall. Cos the inner part is shared between us, so actually quite crowded. Tooo crowded for my liking haha. But today the environment was quite nice. I got help out the korean stall to promote and sell their stuffs (they are always disappearing sometimes) and the stall opposite us (stephanie i think, a temp helper) sometimes got help me promote also. Not bad, helping each other out. And sharing food and soup, haha...

One customer, a teenage boy i think, was quite chatty and was curious about the korean stall, so i help them promote. Then he was quite surprised and say, 'wow, how come you help them to promote?'. Then i replied no lah, "their food really not bad (actually i only tried their soup, quite good!), just being honest mah ~_~" But wait, i wasn't lying, because my sister told me the other food is very nice, just that it is very spicy, so i did not dare to try.

It is really tough doing business there. Only three stalls are doing quite ok, as far as i can see. The rest are all closing down one by one. Today the ice-cream stall is closing down. The stall on both sides of my sis have already closed (before the korean took over). Not to mention the durian puff stall and the taiwanese dessert stall(closed after 1 week, haha). Really don't know how long my sis can survive. But i certainly hope she can do well. But sad to say, though the creations are quite good, it is the nature of the products itself that i think is the problem. Dessert porridge doesn't really seem appealing to the youths there i guess. After sampling both day of my sister porridge, my conclusion is that her consistency are improving. In maintaining food quality i mean. I liked all the three porridges on both days. I had commented (refer to one of my earlier entry) b4 that sometimes the standard drop. But for those reading this, not to worry, can always buy the cold dessert soup to be safe. That one sure ok one, haha...

Yesterday wairen (qinhan) and isen planned a Harry Potter movie trip cum visit to my sister stall. So thankful for their support. The movie was great, I liked it, and I liked the french spoken on the show even more, because i can catch. Ahahaha. "C'est magnifique" is one, and i think i heard "merci" too. Nine of us at the movies. Weiling left us to meet his friends and weiyang joined us for dinner (after visiting my sister stall).

My favourite sports

2005-11-30T22:09:00.000+08:00

Player Names Goals Assists Attendance
Edwin 13 9 8
Bryan 13 8 7
Malau 11 7 7
Sean 9 12 7
Chang Ching 9 3 6
Tham 5 6 3
Lye Heng 5 1 5
Kiat 4 6 7
Yewjin 4 2 4
Yijie 4 1 5
Siling 3 3 4
Jizheng 3 2 5
Shiwen 3 1 2
Weiming 2 2 2
JM 2 2 1
Liangwei 2 0 1
Kenny 2 0 1
Weiyi 1 2 4
Shawn's bro 1 0 2
Kelvin 1 0 2
Da Niu 1 0 1
Kaifeng 1 0 1
Shawn 0 1 3

The above table shows the ranking for our soccer gang. Edwin started taking charge of keeping a record of who scored and who assisted since 8 weeks ago and above are the results. Surprise surprise! Though my attendance is only 4 (out of 8, which means playing only once every two weeks), i'm sitting pretty comfortably at no.11! *clap clap

Actually i'm quite sure i will drop somewhere near the bottom as the statistics continue. Maybe at the end of the year, if i can still be in top 15, i will be happy. (Actually base on above, only 13 people have come for 3 times or more. haha...) This is because their score is based on goals first, followed by assists. Which is definitely a disavantage to me, since i'm a lousy goal-scorer. I simply sucks at shooting and heading. Sometimes i also paiseh to tell people that i play soccer often because i can't juggle ball, i can't shoot and i can't head......

But if the ranking is based on assists, i'm quite sure i can be in top 10 come end of year. Ok, from now on, must make it a point to attend more soccer sessions and improve on my ranking!!!

The gang-fight incident: Just wanna put this incident down for memorial sake. It just so happened that Kelvin and I, with Da Niu, were on the same bus (no 3) and when we arrived at the bus stop, Kiat and Malau had just arrived too. So the 5 of us walked to the basketball court. I was the one holding the ball so i walk slightly faster, just in front of them. From a distance, another group of us (also 5 people) who had arrived earlier just burst out laughing and pointing at us. Saying that we are going for "pia zhui" (gang-fight) issit? The way we walk and the way we come together. "Huh?!" was my immediate reaction. But anyway, i definitely don't look like a gang leader rite? (hmmm, was a leader of a certain religious society though...)

Mon examen plus de

2005-11-26T23:13:00.000+08:00

Had the most torturing day of this semester. I have Bahasa Indonesia I today at 9 am in arts, and at 1 pm, i got Anatomy paper in Science. I think it was the first time (if you don't count Bible Studies exams during my secondary school days, which i will always copy from my classmates, and still fail!) that i did not study at all for an exam. And i really mean at all. I had wanted to grab that blue book and maybe look through in the bus, but i forgot to bring with me in the end. And so be it. This is because anatomy is drivng me crazy with all the memory work. Now i am impressed with all the medical students for the memory work they have to do. It is quite disgusting actually, all those weird weird names: corpus callosum, zona pellucida, zona fasciculata, for eg, which doesn't make sense to you and you have to remember. It was the module i studied the most and yet din have enough time to finish studying all the 9 examinable topics. I took a big gamble today, by studying well, instead of studying all, and i was quite lucky...

The situation:
Lecturer A - Respiratory System, Endocrine System, Nervous System I & II
Lecturer B - Digestive System I, Urinary System, Reproductive System
Lecturer C (his lectures and notes cannot make it one. Too much details and too disorganised) - Musculoskeletal System, Cardiovascular System and Immune System

What i did: I copied in my notes that there will be 5 compulsory questions in the exam. And lectuere A will have 3 questions. Or so I thought. So i went to study all his topics well and truly. Since Lecturer B n C will have 1 question each (i assumed), i studied 2 topics, Urinary and Reproductive for B and 1 topic, Cardiovascular for lecturer C. This is because i could not bear reading his notes.

What came out today:
Qn 1. Musculoskeletal - C
Qn 2. Urinary - B
Qn 3. Ovary (Under Reproductive) - B
Qn 4. Endocrine Glands - A
Qn 5. Nervous System II - A

As you can see, Qn 1 is gone case. Though 2 questions for Lecturer B came out, but it happened I had studied for both, so it was alright for me in the end! However, i just simply could not recall the name of the layer surrounding the oocyte in the primary follicle (which is zona pellucida) so i just wrote 'a serous layer'. And i forgot some other details too, so this qns is partially gone. The rest still ok. Went blog searching and found someone exactly like me: http://whyqueue.blogspot.com/2005/11/anatomy-exam-i-have-been-lucky.html

Actually Qn1 wasn't that bad for me, it had questions requiring some common sense answers. And this topic overlaps with Physiology, which i took yesterday morning (that one is really gone case, got B or B+ i am happy liao). So overall i feel that i had answered quite well, and so deserved an ...? Unless, which is very possible, consider the drive of those yr1s, that everyone else regurgitated out word for word, diagram for diagram everything in the notes... Then i got nothing else to say. Year 4 liao, no more energy to 死背 stuffs...

My First Paper

2005-11-22T22:11:00.000+08:00

Had my first paper today, while people are already looking forward to their last paper tomorrow. Today was my Design paper, my only level 4xxx module this sem, so supposedly the toughest (my four other modules are all level 1xxx modules this sem, which leads to someone always saying that i chao keng). Actually i was most stressed up over this module because i was the least prepared for this module, and i dunno how to study for it. But after quite a few days of hard work, i dare say at least it did not turn out that bad. It could have been much worse...

What happened:
Process Design: Crucial and major part is to develop the Process Flow Diagrams (PFDs), but unlike last year, this year got a lot of crap small questions which i did not prepare in my cheat sheet at all, and turn up i lost at least 7 marks (due to not answering at all). And the PFDs i also dunno whether correct or not. Not enough time to check. I had already ate 15 mins of my next section. And that lecturer kept staring at me. OR rather, my cheat sheet. He was standing besides me for at least 5 mins. I found him so irritating cause i was already quite stress liao, and he just look and looked at my paper. No doubt my cheat sheet is a bit kiasu, but don't need to look until like that right?

Heat exchanger design: Crucial and major part is to develop the Heat Exchanger Network (HEN). THe carzy thing is, i can't figure out the soln and i dun have time to work out. I gave up and go and answer those crap small questions and i have a little more than 5 mins to go back to my HEN design. But blessed me! I figure out i shld use stream splitting and when time was up, whilst they were coming to collect, i just just managed to finish all the calculations. Though that means that i have no time to go back to the previous qns, and some marks lost, it could have been much much worse...... 5 mins make a hell lot of difference...

A short entry

2005-11-21T00:43:00.000+08:00

Kept finding stuffs on the net about the show Trick, of my previous entry. After reading more, found that i missed the show even more. Tempted to get all the three series. After reading these sites, realised that there won't be a continuation of the show, as expected. Sianz...

Very worried about my Design module. So much so i went to school today to photocopy some pages of the reference text from RBR section. After which stayed at the chem eng comp cluster. Brought boon whye n shaowei there too...

Funny event: boon whye talked in hokkien, to complain about another group of pple there. dunno how to translate, my hokkien not good too... in fact it is non-existent...

Decided to include the lyrics for the song in this entry, so i can refer to it easily when i'm listening to this song.

Meteor Shower
The night when it does not become word
You conveying skillfully,
Being entwined it was attached, lukewarmly (lukewarmly) the ivy of harboring (it is)
When fantasy (vision) is, conveying,
Giving heart, it is possible to be your handmade
If the place where it cries the resident in (あ) is the る
The star and the like to be visible, it is not necessary

The voice which it calls even always just changes to sorrow
So scurvy me
So, it just proves, even as needing
You touching (if the わ) me who is not the れ
Unless it is, therefore the same

The everyday life just of ambiguity
To somewhere me loneliness (one person)
When fading, the above this are desired such as
those which 繋 (The cord) in it is in the rank which is not
Name (it is it is) obtaining thinking, with even the faint vibration
In me it echos to those which overflow before the eye

This skin just is abandoned at instant such as miracle
So helpless me
Just it keeps remembering so
So as needing
If me who am not touched you
Unless it is, therefore the same

However innumerable meaning 遮 (even the ぎ) the って it is,
Whether or not it is beautiful, you do not understand
Even now at this place

叫 () As for ぶ voice even when
Just it changes to sorrow
So scurvy me
It proves so just
So as needing
If me whom you do not touch
Unless it is, therefore the same

Song Name: Ryuuseigun 流星群
Artiste(s): Onitsuka Chihiro 鬼束ちひろ
Drama Title: Trick 2
トリック2
Kotoba ni naranai yoru wa
Anata ga jouzu ni tsutaete
Karamitsuita namanuru idake No tsuta o
Maboroshi dato tsutaete
Kokoro o taete anata No te tsukuri de II
Naku basho ga aru No nara
Hoshi nado minakute II

Yobu koe wa itsudatte kanashimi ni kawaru dake
Konna ni mo minikui atashi o
Konna ni mo shoumei suru dake demo hitsuyou toshite
Anata ga sawarenai atashi nara
Nai No to onaji dakara

Aimai na dake No hibi mo
Doko made atashi o hitori ni
Aseru toki wa kore ijou nozomu mono nado
Nai kurai ni tsunaide
Omoi o tataete kazuka na shindou de SAE
Atashi ni wa me No mae de arureru mono E to hibiku

Kiseki nado isshun de kono hada o misuteru dake
Konna nimo muryoku na atashi o
Konna nimo oboete iku dake
Demo hitsuyou toshite
Anata ni sawarenai atashi nara
Nai No to onaji dakara

Kazoe kirenai imi o saegitte iru keredo
Tsukushii ka douka mo wakaranai
Kono basho de ima demo

Yobu koe wa itsudatte
Kanashimi ni kawaru dake
Konna ni mo minikui atashi o
Konna ni mo shoumei suru dake demo hitsuyou toshite
Anata ga sawarenai atashi nara
Nai No to onaji dakara

End of Trick 3

2005-11-16T02:24:00.000+08:00

Have been following this Jap serial on Channel U for the past few weeks. Now that it is over, nothing to watch again...... Today is the final episode. The ending is a pretty clear-cut one, and a pretty warm one, where the guy expressed his love. This was unlike previous series, where the endings are always ambiguous. So i foresee there'll be no more subsequent series for Trick. So sad... Think the lead lady is very chio... Like the ending theme song too. But dunno the title. So can't download :'(

I like such or mystery solving things. Hopefully there will be more of such kind of shows... Thinking of getting VCDs of this series, but nowadays so hard to find Jap serials so i don't think I can ever find...

Back to my bed

2005-11-12T23:43:00.000+08:00

Offered (or being made to offer) my bed to my sis friend for the whole week, since he arrived at our place last saturday. He is a Korean and my goodness, my first impression of him is, erm, he is really short. I definitely cool about it, i mean it is none of my business and he look like a nice guy but for my mum, she dislike everything about him, and started calling him 'ai-zhai' (which mean short guy in Chinese). It is a long story to begin with, but it is definitely a nightmare for the three of us, 4 of us i guess, including him... Wrong move by my sis when the previous matter have just started to settle down. But i can see the reason why. Just glad that he have returned liao and hope the matter will stop for now...

Offered to help my sis manned her stall so she can go out with her friend for a proper outing. The business was really bad, not that i got make my vocals heard to attract customers. Just not my style. Night/evening was slightly better. I really hope her business can work out after she had put in so much effort into it. Heard from her that this whole week was bad, because of a nearby food fair opening.

Today was a sleeping day for me. Slept a lot. Really a lot. Despite that, i found myself coming down with running nose. Oh no, why is my body sooo weak......

My french class... (UPDATED!!!)

2005-11-08T21:16:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, Thurs, 10 Nov 2005, marked the official ending of my French 1 lessons in NUS. It was also the official end of normal school lessons for all the modules. Had my final French test, which took up quite a high percentage in the final grade for the module. But it is my S/U module so i din touch at all until just a few hours before the test. The listening comprehension was a nightmare. Very tough. Looks like i'm definitely not at the level to hear French speak french.

Can see a few of us gonna miss the lessons. It was really quite fun. Bahasa is a very well-planned module. However due to the mixing of all the three lessons, there are hardly a core group of people whom you are close to, whereas in French, seeing each other day in day out do help us to bond better. Heard people said that French is very difficult to start with, but once you get going, it will be better. Absolutely agree with it. I can still remember how it was a nightmare for me initially. I remember complaining to everyone about it, haha...

Took Sohan video camera and had some fun filming the class after the test was over. SW and Boon Whye also brought their digital camera to capture a full class photo (finally!), after the last one was destroyed when Ms Sylvie, our teacher, closed her eyes whilst the photo was shot.

Spot me in the pictures!

IT IS VERY VERY IRRITATING

2005-11-07T00:03:00.000+08:00

Extremely irritated by my mum, but can't blame her... Things must be sort out or else it will just compound together...

Bad move by my sis but can't blame her too. Guess she is rather stressed out by her work. The calm is gone again.

Sianz... And such a crucial week for me too...

Powerful Bacteria

2005-11-03T23:34:00.000+08:00

Can't recalled when was the last time I was this sick...

Summary of what happen:
On Tuesday morning, I met SW (whom was late!!!) to study at YIH study room
Tues (morn): giddy and sleepy
noon: Feeling cold and tired n sleepy
evening: can't stand it, went back to have a rest
night: took my temp, 38.9 C

wed: a super day of torture for me. Besides feeling nauseous, vomited once only though, my head was killing me, n the temp too, rose all the way to 39.4. The paracetamol only works for the first few hours, after which the temp will rise again. I pull myself (no one was at home) to see the nearest doctor @ noon. Even though the whole thing was quite ex, which includes the blood test, i would gladly pay to have the problem fixed. But the doc only gives paracetamol (which i oledi had) and anti-nauseous pills. Its terrible to be so sick n nauseous at the same time, cos though i am supposed to drink a lot of water n consume some food, I just can't take it, with that feeling I am going to vomit anytime. Forced myself to sleep and in the late afternoon the doctor called, and bless me, the blood test result was out, no dengue, but WBC count was low, which indicated a bacteria infection. They asked me to go back and take some antibiotics pills.

Was feeling really bad yesterdayt evening/night. was contemplating whether to go to hospital. Even sms my MO for his advice and called gillian. Guess mind not thinking clearly. However, i presume the antibiotics DOES help greatly. My fever managed to be in control later that night, even though i vomitted. And today, thursday, felt much better. Still feeling the giddiness n slightly feverish at this moment in time, but i hope to make it for sch tmr. And hope that the bacteria dun turn antibiotic-resistant. I have a bad feeling about it, cos i'm actually feeling a bit worse than i was earlier in the day...

At this stage, i guess i'm in no condition to take IPPT on saturday. Sigh... have to go and take alone again... Sianz... And on sunday, i'm supposed to bring the soccer ball. What am i suppose to tell them now?

Lessons learnt?
1. Take a blood test. I don't think i can type this blog if the doctor din realise it was a bacteria infection n prescribe the antibiotics to help me. Even though the results might be negative, at least it gives u a piece of mind.
2. My neutrophils are slightly incompetent in dealing with the bacteria infections? hmmm
3. My karma for killing so many bacteria during my fyp?

Some Pics

2005-11-01T01:19:00.000+08:00

Thanks to a friend who brought his powerful digital cam for the soccer session, I had fun viewing the pictures, which were pretty well taken during the soccer session that had just passed, on sunday. My favourite being the difficult shot where Ed had just headed the ball away. Well-captured!

http://photobucket.com/albums/a74/autumntree/Soccer%20Gang/

Dunno whether my friends mind those nudity pics up for everyone to see or not so decided to set a password for it: soccergang

Something is wrong with my GIT system

2005-10-30T22:22:00.000+08:00

Saved my sister article online, because the article will only be archive for 1 week on The New Paper site... http://www.angelfire.com/un/zeathereal/ . She said the article does help to a certain extent, but definitely not much, from what i can see when i went down to bring her home-cooked dinner from mum on saturday, and to help out for a while... Think the rent is too expensive. It is a crucial factor. Think sales wise, its looks reasonable. I mean if it is elsewhere, definitely will make profit liao, from the amount of sales...

My IBS occurence for the past few months were very low. However today, it gave me quite some problems. As usual, i went for my weekly soccer session at Pasir Ris. However, on my way there, the problem occur again, and I have to find a toilet, which proved a problem for me. Finally i managed to found one, and there was blood again in my stool. Drats, hope it is nothing serious......

Was absolutely exhausted today... Din want to play initially, since not feeling well liao, and i thought it was quite dangerous to exercise when you have diarrhoea. However din want to make a wasted trip, so just played. And all the way till 1 plus in the afternoon. That's 4 hrs plus of football + sunburnt... My legs so sore now, tmr sure will have problem walking.

Sprained my ankle, without twisting it. It just happen, quite early in the game, after i had jumped for a header, and when i land, i felt the pain. slight pain, but i continued to play, and i realised at the end that it had worsened. Not affecting my normal movement but i can felt it when i climb up/down the stairs or when i jump/land. Wonder what happen... Hope i can recover in time for this sat ippt... Shit, that means likely i can't do a final training run before the IPPT. Hope can get silver...

ALORS

2005-10-28T00:27:00.000+08:00

French lectures (we only have small group lectures at tutorial rooms) nowadays are like marketplace. Very noisy. Even i am enjoying myself more during lectures. The teacher especially, she is very cute and always have candid expressions and reactions to our mistakes, our response etc. And me and SW always fool around by saying 'je ne suis pas ici' when she called our names during attendance taking. It means 'I am not here'. That said, she is one of the most direct teachers i have ever seen in University. If she is not happy, she will say or show it out directly, and not afraid of offending anyone. Including her sometimes sacarstic remarks. For more information about her, can check out the link below: www.sleepysnail.blogspot.com

Today there was a conversation role play where we have to come up with a conversation and act it out, based on a detective scene, in groups of 3s. As usual i kena arrowed by my group to be the detective. Was very tired today, after exhausting myself studying for the anatomy test, and then the french test today, and then the practice conversation component of bahasa indonesia. Was very drained but nevertheless tried to put up a good performance for the class. Somehow, things got messed up, with the class highly amused by my incoherent speech. And then Shaowei, who laughed really hard, which leads to me laughing and forgetting my lines and kept repeating 'Alors' which only made the class laughed even harder. If I were a comedian, I would be very happy to see such a response. But i pretty neutral about the situation, not too embarassed or what (because i had laughed a lot too...). However, when the thing was over, the teacher seemed a bit displeased with our efforts.

Thus I was trying to write an email to my French lecturer just now, with my friend, SW. The content is as below:

À: Mademoiselle Sylvie
De: DDSVP Club

Désolée

Dear
Ms Sylvie,

We would like to clarify what happened just now. We prepared for the conversation but each of us wrote our part down on his own paper. So that was why the paper you saw was incomplete. Moreover, due to some unknown reasons, everyone kept laughing when Shwei Lin said 'Alors'. Shaowei was affected by the laugher and couldn't stop laughing too. Eventually Shwei Lin forgot his lines, and the whole conversation seemed like a mess!
Hope you are not too angry because of that.

A Bientôt,

Shao Wei
Shwei Lin

Actually, dunno whether should take French 2 or not, since now she told us she won't be teaching.

Anyway was really naseous and giddy just now, after fetching young bhante back to BL from meditation course. HAving an attitude taxi driver doesn't help. When i reach home at close to 10, i din have the appetite for dinner. :(

Backlog of wedding dinner on tuesday:
Lena's wedding photos were terrific. She looks really good! and Mr Guagua too. Glad to be of some help in their wedding, as the registration counter. Always felt honored when being invited to weddings, minus the angpow part. Anyway met my primary school classmate, Sijia, with the shanyou gang (fenny they all). Couldn't believe it. Such a small world. Le monde est petit! Or maybe, such a small country... Must asked Lena or Fenny when she joined Shanyou. How come never see her b4 when I went there. Have not seen her since primary school!

Je suis malade encore!

2005-10-24T23:51:00.000+08:00

I am sick again!

Either my body constitution is weak (which it is) or the flu virus is very strong - I am down with flu and runny nose again! Was with SW fora few hours today for lessons, and now i have caught the flu virus! Don't feel like doing anything! Oh no...

Looking forward to tomorrow though. Will be seeing a lot familiar faces i guess. Hope they will have a fantastic day tomorrow!!!

Some Pics

2005-10-21T01:28:00.000+08:00

Some of the photos sohan took, while i used his room to iron my shirt for the NUS Networking nite. Darn, he took some pics while i'm changing! :@

Le monde est petit

2005-10-19T23:56:00.000+08:00

The world is small

Monday, after my last lesson of the day, Bahasa Indonesia kelas TA, Cindy told me she will be eating outside. Strange, cos usually i will be the one asking her to accompany me. And now my mum is cooking (back from her work) and Cindy mum is not cooking (cos her mum thought she's taking eight precepts that day). Anyway, so i plan to accompany her to fong seng to eat. On our way, i saw two familiar face trying to do french homework together. So i jio them along to eat. And of course introduce Cindy to them. After some pretty mundane conversation, suddenly the topic of our CCA, BS, was brought into the Buddhism, and we managed to share quite a bit with them. Especially Cindy, whom give a pretty detailed explanation on the Five Precepts. A pity though, I did not touch on the foundamental teachings of Four Noble Truth and Eigthfold Path. However, coincidentally, cindy brought along one of her favorite book to read that day, and so, pass it on to SW, for him to read. Though i doubt he will have the time to do so...

Tuesday, while me and SW are on our way from science to Arts for our consultation with our tutor, someone looking bright and cheery came up. It was Gillian. Having a week of break sure perks her up.Anyway she also knew SW. And Liling, who was with her, too... Hmmm, it is a small world...

Did not touch Bahasa at all. Now i shall see how to pass a test w/o any preparation at all... Hmmm...... My design project are draining me. Chem Eng are so competitive and kiasu. Everyone is doing work which 'spoil market' such that it is a necessity to spoil market liao... One project done. Yet another coming up. Sianz

Un Logement Idéal

2005-10-13T00:27:00.000+08:00

Premier, mon logement idéal devrait être très grand. Il y aura un grand jardin et au tour de jardin, il y a beaucoup d’arbres et fleurs. Il y aura une grande piscine. Il y aura une piscine de station thermale à la maison et il y aura de belles peintures sur les murs. Mon la salle de séjour devrait être chaude et confortable. Ma chambre devrait aussi être belle et grande. Ma maison devrait être à côté de la mer aussi.

Aktifitas Favorit Saya - My Favorite Activities

2005-10-10T02:42:00.000+08:00

Tulis sehelai karangan sebanyak 120 kata dengan : kira kira, acara, dari ...... ke ......, harga, sebenarnya ......., tetapi......., ukuran, warna

Olahraga favorit saya adalah sepak bola. Saya senang bermain sepak bola sekali. Setiap Minggu saya akan bermain sepak bola dengan teman saya. Dari rumah saya di Paya Lebar, saya akan naik bis ke Pasir Ris. Pasir Ris ada jauh sekali dari rumah saya, kira kira 45 menit naik bis. Saya juga senang menonton jepang animations. Satu CD animations berharga lima belas ringgit. Tetapi Channel Central sering memperlihatkan animations pada hari kerja malam. Saya juga menonton yang ini. Sebenarnya saya mesti melakukan meditasi sehari-hari tetapi saya punya banyak pekerjaan rumah sehari-hari. Saya selalu tidak ada waktu untuk melakukan meditasi. Tetapi saya senang melakukan meditasi. Biru ada warna favorit saya. Saya punya satu sepatu biru dan banyak baju kaos biru. Saya memakai ukuran-L baju kaos dan ukuran sepuluh sepatu.

Oh no, don't know how to use "acara" so din use in my essay. A rough translation: I like to play soccer, watch animations and do meditation. I like blue colour. I wear size L t-shirts and size 10 shoes.

Ham Sak Dog?

2005-10-06T01:14:00.000+08:00

Had a tiring day in school today. Tiring in terms of project, cos dunno what to do, so just stare at teammates do working very hard to solve the problem. I hate that kind of feeling, and although I sure could read up more by myself, I do wish they can be more communicative.

Anyway joined Kimberly, 'Hwai', Haifeng, Wenyan and Kim Sim for the run today. Although they all finished by the time I went there. This is because I too paiseh to leave my project group mates while they are still solving. I can't say like I will settle the rest at home because I do not know what to do!!! And the run, cannot make it. Although this is my first time run in a long time, i have been playing soccer pretty regularly. And yet today timing was 12:44! Sucks...

Unexpectedly met SW at PGP canteen today. Tmr gonna get back my Bahasa and French tests on the same day. No sweat. Whatever the result, i'm gonna pass anyway......

Played with my neighbour's dog (same blk, not same level) near the lift just now. It is a huge dog but very friendly, but... buaya (or hamsak)??? Cos it licked my ...... and the legs around the area. Make me feel so paiseh. whahahaha. How i wish I have a pet to play with. And I guessed the dog I had 19 years ago is no longer around... Can't even remember whether it is a she or a he... May the dog be well and happy!

Keluarga Saya

2005-10-03T02:23:00.000+08:00

Keluarga saya tinggal di Singapura. Kita tinggal di apartemen kecil di Paya Lebar. Ibu saya berasal dari Malaysia. Dia sangat cantik sekali. Ketika dia masih muda, Ibu punya banyak pacar. Abang perempuan saya juga sangat cantik sekali. Pacarnya tidak tampan tapi dia suka padanya. Tetapi sekarang mereka putus hubungan. Dia asalnya dari Singapura dan tentu saja, dia belum menikah. Bapak saya meninggal lima tahun yang lalu. Saya mempunyai seorang abang laki-laki. Dia badannya tinggi dan gagah, tetapi dia masih mempunyai pacar. Keluarga saya senang makan durian tetapi bukan abang perempuan saya. Dia membenci sekali durian! Keluarga saya senang makan mangga juga. Tetapi mangga harus berasa manis dan tidak menjadi asam!

(seratus sepuluh kata)

Edited with help from Hidayat.

丝路

2005-10-02T01:21:00.000+08:00

I like this song the moment i hear it. Dunno why. Makes me feel very melancholic... Not that i am in a good mood today, so after listening to this song, it makes me feel even worse. haha... Anywya i think this is a very difficult song to sing. Like damn high towards the end. Think Fish Leong have been improving all these years.

丝路

如果流浪是你的天赋
那么你一定是我最美的追逐
如果爱情是你的游牧
拥有过是不是该满足

谁带我踏上孤独的丝路
追逐你的脚步
谁带我离开孤独的丝路
感受你的温度
我将眼泪流成天山上面的湖
让你疲倦时能够扎营停驻
羌笛声胡旋舞为你笑为你哭
爱上你的全部放弃我的全部

爱上了你之后我开始领悟
陪你走了一段最唯美的国度
爱上了你之后我从来不哭
谁是谁的幸福
我从来不在乎
谁是谁的旅途
我只要你记住

星星就是穷人的珍珠
你的笑支撑着我虔诚的最初
狂风沙是我单薄衣服
穿越过亚细亚的迷雾

云破日出你是那道光束
带着平凡的我走过奇迹旅途

Energy

My first camp in BS was in july 2003. I remember at Palelai Temple, I met this lady from China (who disappeared after the camp, haha). Me, Fucai and her (I forgot her name) had a little chat while enjoying the food @ Palelai. The rest had all left for campus. She said something which struck me to this day. We were discussing about vegetarian and life forms. She said she believe all things have 'life'. As in plants have feelings, and can response appropriately. However what struck me was about her view on people and their relationships. People, according to her, are attracted to each other by their energy. We are constantly seeking for people who can increase our energy level.

Eg: We are always excited about about new friends and making new friends energise you. After some time, when the energy had died down, you begin to seek for new energy somewhere. As a result one's past relationship stabilised (or stagnant or decline as we no longer can give each other the energy that we need). It is a very interesting way to look at relationships. Think this is quite true.

Have been thinking about something. Are we attracted to (not in terms of BGR but friendship) younger people to give us the energy that we need? As in they possess something which can supplement our energy level. I feel that this whole set of energy theory is quite applicable to me. Eg, at my current status in BS, i do feel more energised by the younger batch around. Like Vincent, and a more recent example, those young kias in my French class.

Make a pretty close friend there SW, who was the only one who talked to me when i was feeling completely lost and blur. :'( Anyway since then I have settled down and quite enjoyed the lessons. Find that my teacher is really humorous. Initially din really like her. In fact just a few days ago, i meet two other people who was studying French I and both of them told me they don't like Ms Sylvie. Their class was taught by her for the first few lessons. However I think if she has continued to teach them, they might feel differently. She is quite nice and willing to spend time to tutor us outside class hours. Really feel quite grateful to her. Anyway back to my friends in my class. We stayed on MSN for 4 plus hours last night, till 3plus am! Crazy. I realised that when i'm talking to them, i'm more willing to use certain choice of words which i would usually not use in BS. They too. In fact i found them quite mean (but very funny) to discuss abt other people names. LoLz. Feel that it is so nice to be year ones. Jialat, don't feel like growing up. Imagine have to go into work place in less than 8 months. Haiz. This is what Buddha says about Dukkha? I dunno...

Long post... Tmr soccer again. Hope can wake up. Studies really seem to be bottom on my priority list nowadays...

The missing song

2005-08-08T01:45:00.000+08:00

Finally found the song that i wanted to hear very much, supposedly the theme song for Autumn in My Heart (but not included in the soundtrack here, strange). So glad i had found that CD, which contain quite a number of songs i really liked. Anyway those who have watched 萧十一郎 will find the song familiar, since 王杰 did a cantonese cover of this song. But i sooo much prefer this original version.

Today was quite an eventful day. Had the ritual sunday soccer session (which for the past 2 yrs have not really become a ritual for me) today. Actually woke up an hour in advance for it, but nonetheless my diarrhoea from last night continue this morning, and by the time i arrive, i was 20 mins late, feeling sick and don't feel like playing. But we were still waiting for people to arrive (all the late kias) so after i rest and prepared myself, i decided to carry on.

For the past few sessions, I had began to take off my shirt while playing soccer. It is quite a counter-intuitive action to do since now that we shift our playing time from 8am to 9am, we are more exposed to the glaring sunrays, thus i;m exposing my body to more risk of sunburn. However it really does feel much more cooling, n not so restrictive. However i'm not used to it, especially the body to body contact, which make me really feel very gao wei. Even in the past, with my shirt on, i would take care to have minimal body contact with those with their shirt off. Slimy and disgusting... Dunno whether my frens season liao or what, they don't seem to mind at all, which is very disgusting to me, cos this friend of mine did a body checked on me, where almost a whole body length of body contact was made. I was absolutely cringing in disgust at the interaction of sweat between our bodies that i totally lost interest in chasing after the ball, and intuitively tried to wipe the contacted sweat off. Yucks...

A group of 4 malays, quite young, think 17s or 18s, wanted to join in, and we graciously welcomed them. Dunno whether it is because our location is very ulu, we very rarely have outside people to play with. Anyway being malays, we have a tendency to think that they are better than us. However, we form 3 groups of 4s, which after including them, 4 groups of 4s, all our 3 groups managed to beat them cimprehensively. Din want to use the word thrashing, so as not to seem arrogance. But deep in my heart i was feeling quite bad for them, come in for 1 match, kena knocked out, then have to wait for 2 more groups for their turn, only to be knocked out again. But come to think about it, they are still young. No doubt my friends have much more experience, and physically, they definitely lost out to us. And being in a 'hostile' environment might mean a lot of difference too...

Evening went for a movie outing at GV, Plaza Sing. A lot of people. Really a lot, and we have a lot of people too. 17 of us. Congrats to Kim Sim for such a successful outing. After the movie, we went over to fort canning and the feeling i got from the large group of people is that of a warm and comfortable one. Seems pretty motivating for the future of BS...

Simple

2005-07-25T02:15:00.000+08:00

Let us dig our gardens and not be elsewhere:
Let us take long walks in the open air...
Let us bathe in the rivers and lakes...
Let us indulge in games...
Let us be more simple: simple and true in our minds above all. Let us be ourselves.
—Robert Linssen

A new beginning

2005-07-18T15:00:00.000+08:00

It is a new beginning for my reservist unit as we have been transferred to a new division, 2 PDF, which we will collaborate with ASU. Had a try in the V200 (over 40 years old!) at clementi camp. It was damn cramped in terms of leg space for me. Wonder how am i going to survive the journey in the vehicle. But anything beats being a boxer battalion! AND ANYTHING BEATS WALKING!!! No more 16 km nonsense. Phew... And i thought i gonna do those same things over and over again in reservist. But since we are just being introduced to our new role, mabbe it will be worse than walking infantry when the real training start (although i still think anything beats walking...).

Actually although i hate to go back to army every year, somehow it is always nice to see those familiar faces in my unit, especially my platoon. And u get to laugh at how their size and fitness have changed while their faces still looked the same. In fact most of their ippt really cmi liao. I got a shocked when i look at their 2.4 timing. A lot were within the range of 15 to 18 mins. In fact only 2 pple got gold, compared to their first year in NS, where 90% of the company got gold. And yes, i failed my ippt in this ict again, at tanjong gul camp. Actually my pull up was good, surprisingly cos i have not trained at all since i injured my fingers. Everything else was fine too, so all i need to do is to get a good timing of below 11:40 for my 2.4 km run to get silver. But haiz... Missed the passing mark by 10-plus seconds instead. Could not even pass...

Dunno whether due to the fact it was a low key ICT, or that the training was more relax. In fact, i found this ICT quite enjoyable. Was able to have a good chat with some of my platoon mates. Got some new guys in our unit, and a lot of new commanders. To be transferred as men i think is damn suay, since most of the men know each other liao. As for the commanders, felt quite sad that quite a lot of them had downgraded or sign on, etc... Especially my PS, whom had signed on with Prison service. Dunno why, though he always make fun of me or call me slacker, or always arrow me, no matter what he has always been with me during mission (the PS buddy is the Pl medic mah), and concentration, shellscrape, etc... Will kinda miss him. Sounds mushy, but i have always thought he is very important to the platoon. HE dun mind being the ultra bad guy, but he is very efficient, and our platoon usually have the least problems in terms of missing equipment etc.

The new PS? Section 2 commander take over. Haiz, have to work with him. Not cfm yet though cos i might be the company medic, which mean that i will work with CSM instead. Back to new PS. He lacked a jackknife during the inspection by PC during the mob on saturday. However, while PC was inspecting others, he borrowed my knife, and put in it another pack. After which he showed PC he had misplaced it in that pack. -_- Actually i dun really mind lah, cos should help one another. And being the PS and not having a full set of equipment might not borne well with the commanders. But somehow i just dun have confidence in his competency. Not as good as Eugene. But impermance. Must learn to adjust. Once a year only anyway...

Sure can't wake up tmr one :(

2005-07-13T00:17:00.000+08:00

Haiz, wanna blog out my a bit of my frustration for the past 2 days back at SMM at Nee Soon Camp, but ended up spending two hours or more in front of my comp reading some emails and trying to settle a pretty serious MC problem... Hope my only email reply wasn't too unmindful and can help a bit ...

Anyway had a terrible day with IV yesterday, and a sianz day of PAM training today...

Yesterday MY eye popped wide open (and my shooting Buddy too) when i saw the Mdm pull out the cathether n the needle together, only to insert in back into my hand. Shucks, dun she know that due to sterility issue, and safety issue, one is not supposed to insert any needles used back into yr body, not to mentioned back into the same vein? And she forced the cathether in some more. CAn't describe the pain. Also dunno for what logical reason the army have that we have to endure every year. Yucks

Today was a sianz day. No more POCM in outfield. ONly M.PAM. anyway had a talk with an instructor who is coming NUS or NTU next yr. So i gave him my contact n nusbs website, after he seem interested upon telling him or rather, questioning him on what he noe about Buddhism. So i shall say Sadhu to myself...

Dun think i have time to blog more or do finished up my writeup for LOW, so if Lena's reading this, can forgive? *embarrassed...

Excused from IPPT

2005-07-06T01:28:00.000+08:00

Went to the YIH doctor again yesterday. Wanted to ask about the x-ray of my finger and also to seek recommendation about the upcoming ICT. I told him it was doing fine, pain was less and mimimal swelling, except still can't clench fully. Din told him my hand was hit while playing soccer the day before though... Anyway he said 'good good' while moving my finger around. However while shaking the 2nd notch of the finger, which seem pretty loose to me, he said still not so good yet, but doing fine. ANyway i ask if i can continue with pull-up and he said he will write a memo to the MO to recommend for me to be excused. The thing is, after he shake my finger about, my finger seems more swollen today, and definitely range of motion seem more restricted today, though it might be because i forgot to apply the chinese medicine last night...

Anyway i realised that even if i'm down, if i can still blog means that it is still somewhat ok. Cos i was feeling rather unhappy the past week or so. I guess family are the fiundamental of one's life. Once harmony is not there, one's mental well-being will be affected...

Thanks ae for attempting to write in his blog abt the faith part......
Happy birthday in advance to big bro Gor
Wish CEP a huge success in advance.
Wish that i will have more volunteers for Bodhi Big Walk...
CRAVINGS!!! :@ Dukkha......

Finger much better. 正骨水 is good!

2005-06-22T02:51:00.000+08:00

Apply 正骨水 for the past two night certainly help a lot. The swelling has subside much and the pain too, although it is still quite sensitive to movement, but today lab it wasn't really such a bother as it was the day b4...

Met sin, machan and bein siong for lunch today at yih. Funny combination but Machan specially came back for lunch cos i told him bein siong need to sign his CCA card urgently, and the stamp is with him (sohan). After my lab, help sin with the engin noticeboard, and met Nhan to chat up with him for a while, sin accompany me to NUH (make a mistake when i tot the x-ray wld be in YIH) for the x-ray. Actually kinda of dun want to waste the money going for x-ray since i'm 99% sure everything is fine now, esp since the pain n swelling has sudside so much but still went ahead anyway. Dunno what i'm thinking, waste money......

Went for the long-due ktv session with my jc frens. Actually i wasn't very on, more of an obligation, cos can't really find the mood to go singing now that the deadline is nearing, but decide to go anyway cos have always been the problem for them in trying to organise outings. As time progress though, i was enjoying the session more and more. It din matter that i had been out of touch with chinese pop for a long time. I realise that there are some pretty nice songs out there. Li Sheng Jie, muz go find all his song. Lin junjie also. and also huang yida - 蓝天. The best gotta be　张敬轩 - 断点. Can't get the song out of my head. Not with my bro playing this song day in day out. Sang this at KTV just now. Realise they all like this song too... Love this line esp: 深藏的暗涌已经越来越明显. Dunno why but it just sound very catchy to me.

Best part though is that we decide the theme for the night shall be retro and we had great fun and laughter to compete in finding old songs. Songs like 三年, 一剪梅, 好好爱我, etc... and 温柔的夜. Nice songs though. Had fun... Oh ya, tried those songs which i think are difficult to sing, 伤逝, my all time fav song 离人. My fren mention that once he went ktv, his other fren use this song as a warm-up. We all wah wah over this. At that instance can't think of other song higher than this. But then when we tried this song, and 彩虹 by powerstation, both down one key, i realise that this is easier to sing compared to 彩虹, in terms of highness... The worst song, mabbe because it is one of the last songs we sang, is 情牢 by hacken lee. Old and nice but difficult!!! Even though we down one key, but we also completely cannot make it. Totally buang. So paiseh. Somehow i think if Gor sing this song it will be very nice. Think such songs are meant for him. Or issit because i have heard him sing b4 at his place... hmmm....

Realised that my group is so different. Though most of us can hold a tune pretty decently, the limitations are there. And we need to down keys etc or just whacked our voice off. But the last time i went with kim sim, puay hong n vincent, they all can sing so well, make me feel so paiseh to sing w/o fear. Conclusion: I feel more at ease n fun singing with my not so good at singing jc frens. Haha...

Hand will need a long time to heal completely

2005-06-21T02:20:00.000+08:00

Guess i can't get to learn guitar afterall after my fyp is done. NO guitar for a month i think :S

Hope tmr x-ray will be alright. SHldn't have any problem though i think.

Brought back some memories listening to some old final fantasy songs. Especially like this song. Think it is positive and meaningful. Haiz, childhood is so fantasy-like. Castle, heroes, magic etc...

The Breeze
Are we strangers in this place?
Looking for a place unknown?
We're just leaning on the breeze...
Saying not to give it up...
Can we find the truth behind us,
When the long journey ends?

Are we wrapped in mysteries?
Walking down the winding roads?
Can we find the reason why we are
In this world of trials?

Here comes the breeze, that's whispering in peace
So full of lights, shining in colors
Don't be afraid, just keep on trying in your way
And you will see how all is sight...

Are we strangers in this place?
Reaching out for dreams unknown?
Now we feel our minds are flying high
In this world of liberty

Here comes the breeze that's whispering again
So full of lights shining in colors
Listen to me, just keep on trying in your way
Get the courage to open the door and soon you'll be free...

Black out

2005-06-20T01:27:00.000+08:00

I thought my entry tonight tonight will be solely on the bball session at src just now. But something just happen again.

Today a pretty low morale day, i felt guilty over something. But anyway still managed to make my way to school to do my lab. Everything was quite alright till i finally reached src at ard 6.

i meet this man ard late twenties or early thirties at the stadium toilet. Really different, dunno how to describe also, but of a likeable n cool character oso, sort of lift up my spirits for the day. hope i will have such mentalities of his when i'm his age.

Anyway besides that big group of malays playing soccer at the handball court, there was only this other group of pple playing. I decide to ask them but their extra man dun want to play hence if i go in i'll be ood, so decide not to force my way in, and no soccer yet again. Sigh...

So got persuaded by sohan to play bball with puayhong n another guy. After which they tried some stunts n i duly tried it out too.. Then i twist my finger. Real bad. It was bend much further behind when i extend it fully then it usually was and i had to keep bending it n pulling, hoping it will straighten out. I then asked puay hong to help me, then suddenly everything is blacking out. Their voices too. I can hear puay hong asking me if it is too painful but i'm din reply. Everything was just blanking out. Very slowly though. But i still managed to utter that i'm blacking out. Then they help me to sit down. It lasted for a few minutes i think, after which it was better n i regain full consciousness again. Strange, my previous experience when i blank out is that it is a swift process, suddenly one, then also suddenly regain conciousness, but this was hmmm......

The last time happen also when i was at a bball court, playing soccer though. N i thought mabbe it is becos i din had anything. This time though, i though mabbe it is becos i din had lunch (din tell sohan n puayhong abt that though). SO din thought much of it.

But just only, while i was collecting the laundry from the pole n folding the clothes, my mind went momentarily blank again. Two episode within a day. Strange. Am i lacking in blood? Iron? or wat? :S

People nvr learn, do they?

2005-06-16T21:08:00.000+08:00

Though the title sound heavy, it is not meant to be.

Was feeling a bit sick. Had sore throat and stomach like a bit bloating. But... BUT i can't resist the temptation when my brother, whom came back from jb, bought some titbits, like that spicy sugar cuttlefish. Just ate n ate. sigh... i really nvr learn.

Also my fyp, keep wanting to do, but keep end up doing other stuffs, clicking on my songs, or talking to pple etc... Talking about songs, kept listening to vincent recording of my song, 又到了夏日时候. He did a real great job there. Like it sooo much. He sang it almost exactly the way i had meant it to be when i wrote it. oooh.....

Link to his blog which host my song ->
vinclone

Anyway, since i host both songs on angelfire, i hope i dun get condemn by them again for overshooting bandwidth usage. Whatever...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Falling Sick

Falling sick. It those kind of sucky feelings when u at the boundary of being sick. :S

Slept a lot today. Remind me of those school holidays when i wld sleep 12+ hours a day. A lot of stuffs need to be done. In fact, nothing had been done yet! Sighz...

Anyway yesterday had been a fun day for me. Thanx to vincent for entertaining me with his recording of songs, and Sohan n Puay Hong who joined us later. As usual i think his guitar rocks n together, we record quite a number of funny tracks. The song that is being played now is the track we have recorded, and which i have done a bit of editing...

Hey My Friend

2005-06-12T00:21:00.000+08:00

词/曲: zeathereal

There’ll be times when we are dreaming
Of the mystery world out there
Looking up while we are lying
Silent words are all we shared

There’ll be times when we are lonely
Looking for a while around us
But this is also a chance to see
What lies deeply inside our hearts

*Hey my friend
With you by my side
My world will never end
Hey my friend
No matter when (Good times or bad)
You will always be my friend

There’ll be times when we are seeking
For the precious truth out there
It does not matter what we will achieve
It is the journey that we have

Repeat *

Thanks my friend
Because of you the sun will shine again
Thanks my friend
For being there when I was in despair

Repeat *

Dedicated to 霞妹 (prawn sister)

2005-05-31T02:02:00.000+08:00

Was chatting on the phone with a pretty close friend of mine (or rather, used to be pretty close). It was her birthday yesterday. Had been wanted to call her since afternoon, when i remembered it is her birthday. But then i keep pushing it later, wanted to call her when i'm more free, so can have a longer chat with her, but then my lab end sooo late, i had to ask Machan to 'ta-bao' for me. He insisted on giving me a treat, even though i insisted on not to. But really thanks to him, it was a pretty nice packed dinner, really king size...... Enough to make up for the fact i din had lunch... THANK YOU MACHAN!!!

Back to the call, i overstayed at Machan room and had to climbed the pgp gate, with Machan's help. When I reached home it was 12 plus and I remembered the call and was like 'oh shit!!!' Damn, same as last year, it was belated liao... Haiz, better belated than nvr. Anyway had a really nice long chat with her. Felt an uplift in spirits straightaway. Even showed her my newly picked guitar skills, sang the chorus of '忘了', my very first song 'there in my heart', whom she had help me arranged and was my guitarist, and finally, '又到了夏日时候'. She like it very much and said it lifted her spirits while listening to it, though she can't catch the lyrics. Going to send her the song.

I wonder if she's gonna ask me who's the person in the song that i had written. Better not, else quite paiseh to say that those two songs were both inspired by her. Back then i remember we were quite close. We both like Faye, and '扑火', a pretty unknown song of Faye, was one of our favorite. I remembered i had always pestered her to sing the song through the phone to me, among other songs. Simply love her voice and her singing... Oops... When i had composed the first song, i quickly called her to share with her.

I don't really like to talk much about myself back then, so when my father passed away, only two of my friends i confided in. One is Sean, and another is her. Din plan it this way, but i think the saying that when something happens, the first person(s) you contact showed their importance to you is true. I must really thank her for being there for an important period in my life. All the best to her teaching career at TPJC as a GP teacher...

Oh ya, I always call her 霞妹 har moi (pronounced in Hakka, she is a Hakka too, but she will always 'OEI' when i call her that...) So fun, but must clarify, it is not a love story, there wasn't anything at all but just an memorable past... Hopefully she don't get to read my blog too... Unlikely, since none of my secondary school friends know i have this blog. Phew...

Bodhi Big Walk

Haiz wanted to write this entry since last night, but now, after typing so much, will just publicise a bit.

NUSBS will be helping out as Road Marshals, together with NTUBS. Includes,
1. Route Marshals
2. Water point + distribution of lucky draw tickets
3. Old folks team, accompany the old folks to walk a much shorter route, interact with them
4. Bus guide team at Bedok interchange, to lead people to the shuttle service
5. General Setup

It will be held on 17th July, in conjunction with Dhamma Day. Organised by Buddhist Library. I need volunteers. Though exact work scope haven been split and assigned yet, please let me know if you can/interested to help out. I need a rough gauge of how many volunteers we can give from NUSBS side. Please help to spread the message.

Riki asked me a gd question last night when i asked him why NTUBS had no rep at the meeting. Actually i was asking myself the same qn even when I was at the meeting, about the aim of the walk. What do we hope to acheive? Actually to be very honest, i felt that the walk is an event that can be scrapped, especially since Vesak was not too long ago and each society have their FOC to plan with. Cum the fact they seemed to assume each TIBS will be helping doesn't seem a very correct approach to take. It does not raised much funds for BL, and certainly Dharma elements seem to be minimal...

And the meeting was draggy and a bore for all TIBS, since we can't really be involved in the planning... So basically it is hearing them discussing about their family businesses... Only some parts are relevant to us. And i was tired. In fact i'm very tired recently by my school work. But what perk me up was Bhante's witty remarks and his involvement. At such an age and such reputation, i admired his zest in his outreaching work, especially being a Theravadan monk. He is definitely a venerable to be respected.

So i'm quite on about the walk for a few main reasons:
1. Respect for Bhante and thanks to BL for lending us location quite often.
2. Friendship with young Bhante
3. Raise funds for both BL and NUSBS. Though Bhante said all the donations each TIBS collected will go to themselves, after discussion with Isen, we both agree it shld be split.
4. Not much activities i can help organise before i step down. Esp so since i'm not involved in CEP. Let this be last few burst of fire...
5. Though not very meaningful, at least these are not harmful activities, if you get what i mean... Can promote family bonding and creating awareness for Buddhist Library...

I guess these are good enough reasons... So i'll need lotsa of support. If anyone is interested in taking over as the main coordinator from NUSBS just let me know... Will be glad to let u have the joy.

Prediction

2005-05-26T01:56:00.000+08:00

Stomach a bit rumbling now. The type of feeling i get which i know will give me a stomache the next morning. IBS i call it. Anyway i know that i will sleep late tonight and wake up in morning tmr, and doing will more or less increase my IBS occurence. Mabbe i shld really go get the fybrogel Lena's boyfriend recommend.

Yesterday night was one of those times i 'chatted' with myself again. Like what Lena told me b4, they do that, in their blog, to keep themselves 'sane', but unlike her, i din put it down in my blog, at least, not for everyone to see, but it kinda of make u reflect and analyse yourself. It does helps a bit...

No thanks to my mum, i barely had a few hrs of sleep today. She woke me up at 7 plus. Had to accompany her to the bus station to help her get ticket to go KL. After which i left for school directly.

I came back, rest for a while (= sleep) and go on to meet my friend at bugis to return her some stuffs. Wah, she had 变大只 liao, evident of her training in OCS. Only had time to chat for a while only, after which i rushed to meet sin, santo and sohan at harbour front. heehee, i suggested this location cos i din want a place too far away from my home. The food was so-so, desserts were damn ex, and sohan insisted on watching american idol there so we had to find a place to watch.

Kinda of tired now, but wanna watch the soccer match badly. I hope acmilan win!!! Hope i can survive... Haven been meditating. Shall go n do that now...

had a great day of singing...

2005-05-24T02:55:00.000+08:00

Was looking forward to a great day of fun with the MC pple, but with some last minute planning and lousy coordination by Isen(=p) and put paper aeroplane by sohan, end up i was alone. Waiting only for Gordon to come. Luckily i jio-ed sin and santo to come over.

Initially it was pretty dry, watching animes. I suggested detective conan, cos i wanna watch, but santo can't read chinese and sin was falling asleep, so we change to some more 'violent' ones which sin had with him. Not bad, Bleach and MAR. Think i will start downloading them... We also sang some songs in-between.

The highlight of the day was when we started recording our singing. It was really quite fun, especially those irritating moments when the phone rang, or when my mum opened the door, which was all recorded. Those who want to hear our recording, which includes mostly bs songs, and my song, can go gmail, username: sohan.pics
Get the password from me bah...

Felt a slight lift in spirit. Thankful for some good company to make my break worthwhile...

ps: vincent, sorry for putting yr photos. really sorry about it...

Vesak day

2005-05-23T12:42:00.000+08:00

The photos are up at here

Didn't really do a lot during the two days at vesak at PKS. We have a combined booth this year and spaces are really scarce for us to
1. Set up combined sign up booth for STIBS
2. Promotional stuffs for CEP n CNS
3. Promotional stuffs for Bodhi Big Walk
4. To sell stuffs for nusbs

Wasn't really that interested in helping YM to distribute their stuffs so end up quite lobo, cos business wasn't really that good. The most motivating part was when they need someone to go and collect back flyers from Panna Youth Centre at the main gate of PKS and i volunteered my service immediately, together with ChunKiang, who was volunteered. We then talk a bit about PYC on the way walking to the main gate. Though it was quite straining on my voice to shout continously for 2 hrs, there was a certain sense of satisfaction in my job, in minimising contact of those who went to PKS with PYC. Deep down though, i know it can't be said for sure who's wrong or right.

While boarding bus 13 outside Bishan mrt, someone tap me on the shoulder and smile at me. I just couldn't remember who is he though i definitely know him. After we boarded the bus, i sat down beside him and both of us were pondering who the hell is each other. Schools came out and finally army and he was the one who remember me first, as the company medic. Oh ya, i remembered him cos he was those fit and have positive attitude one. Too bad commando din want him and he is working at osim now. Wah, if i were him and i saw someone i barely know, not to mentioned can't remember exactly, i will most likely leave that person alone. But glad he called out to me...

feeling better now

2005-05-18T10:32:00.000+08:00

Thanks for concern of some of my friends. Really appreciate it.

A close friend went to fetch me to school today, and i have gordon to fetch me back. wahahhaa...

Even mr guagua ask me what's wrong and gabriel sms me. Thanx to them and the following: agga+ananda+sean+gillian+gordon+vincent+meteoriz+Wj+++

Today received news from my mentor that my co-supervisor don't allow me to buy P4VP cos it is too ex. Sorta expected it, so actually din feel that bad. In fact i felt better after clarifying with my mentor the progress of my expt. It really helps talking to someone whom you know will be able to understand what you are talking about...

decision making

2005-05-16T01:54:00.000+08:00

Just came back from Orchard. After packing up, some of us went for movie screening at cineleisure for 'Kingdom of Heaven'. Not very interested in such show. LOTR trilogy was good, wasn't interested in Troy either but went to watch nonetheless so i found myself watching yet another period show. Orlando Bloom...

Anyway though the show leaves much to be desired when compared to LOTR, i quite enjoyed it, as in i found the historical parts quite interesting. And i understand a bit more about the crusade. Always heard this term b4 though nvr really found out much about it.

But the show ended at close to 12 and by the time i was at the bus stop, I only have 65 to take... 16 was gone a few minutes earlier. So i waited and took the last 65 for the night (the person boarding with me asked the driver) and drop at Geylang East Police station. As i was preparing to walk home, I suddenly remember the busstop have 154, which came from Boon Lay, which can take me a few bus stops down where i'm walking. I estimate, base on 30 which came from boon lay also, that there is still buses left for 154. I decide to wait for 5 mins, becos i was uncertain of my assumption. When 6 mins was up, i sigh and told myself to make a move, and not to look back even if the bus came, cos the next stop was quite far away, i can't possibly catch it. But i just knew that it will happen, 154 will come and i will be damn tui.... Yes it happenned and i was pissed with myself for not waiting for a little while longer.

If i had continue to wait, and the bus never came, i will be labelled a stubborn and ignorant fool. If i left and the bus came, I will be an impatient man who does not believe in myself. So the trick is to have a reasonable waiting time for the bus. But what is reasonable? ...

Anyway i din walk for too long, ard 20 mins. And when i reached my side finally, the gate was spoilt and the notice informed us to use the front gate a distance away. Without even thinking twice i scoff at it and climbed over the fence within seconds. Yes, i just discovered yet security vulnerability...

Met chilong's friend at the booth today. He was with vincent lim. He called himself Dave. I learn that they were from the same unit in army. Anyway he must have been the person vincent told me the other time whom i had supposed impressed during a little discussion on Christianity on the mrt. Wow, i can't really remember that though.. Ahaha, must have been during one of those trips when we were together on the mrt with chilong. Was quite surprise to see that he was so interested in Buddhism. Mabbe becos he is Chilong's friend and becos of some assumption i had of his appearance. Anyway Dave seems a bit awkward when i tried to talk to him. Must be becos i'm not a friendly person, as i usually wun acknoledge his presence unless chilong is around.

Glad he is willing to leave his contacts with us so readily though. And vincent is quite impressive. At introducing Buddhism to friends through skilful means. Thinking back, i really have not really shared Buddhism to a great extent to my friends. Sin does not really count since he had his close friend as a buddhist guide (though i did bring him into BS). Today my fren came down also, Wee Kiat, also an army friend but did not really did a great job in hosting him. Hope he dun mind...

PS: thanks to *vincent for meeting me for breakfast and sorry for making u wait today.

A night of nightmare

2005-05-15T00:26:00.000+08:00

There are many obstacles I have met with during my life as a student so far but this got to be a real test for me. My mood hit rock bottom again just a few hours ago, when i broke and spill the flask containing my readied beads onto the floor. I fucking only have one more, the last last try (not even one full try left) to make another set of beads for my test.

I shld really really have push for my mentor to get P4VP a couple of weeks ago. I think he din know actually i had not made any progress at all. Now it will be too late. Assuming i can persuade him to get more P4VP, and it will take 1 mth to come, i only have 2 weeks left to do anything with the raw material. That's mission impossible. Unless a miracle happen and I can go get a few grams of P4VP myself...
A few grams will cost $100 but i guess i have no choice now... Alternatively is I have to fake a lot of my results...

Now, i really really really hope whatever i have salvaged from the dirty floor will works. At least, let me get an idea of what conc of bacteria i shld use so that i can get conclusive results... At least, my last batch of beads i will be able to do a complete testing.

I have to clear up the mess and i left close to 11pm. It din help the rain was pouring and i was hungry and damn cold... But it did help when my mum came to fetch me at the busstop with an umbrella and I had some dinner with hot soup.

Can i survive this test?

Four Days in a Row

2005-05-13T01:50:00.000+08:00

I must have been feeling rather stress lately for my IBS to keep occuring...

Tiredz...

This is not working. No more BS after this week. I need to conc fully on FYP. So many things need to understand and do. I shall ignore all those things regarding Bodhi Big Walk

BS got lotsa singing talents

2005-05-10T22:37:00.000+08:00

Went for a 3 days chalet at PA chalet, uninvited. Dunno why I ended up staying overnight, for two nights.

Yesterday was quite fun at the KTV. Bein Siong, me, Kim sim, Puay Hong, Vincent, and Kimberly went to K-Box at tampines. Kim Sim can really sing well, so does puay hong and Vincent. And Vincent sound super like Ah-Du. The rest of us all thought so. Super-like. Although, he doesn't seem to really think it is a compliment... hmmm...

No one was staying back at the chalet so i said I'll stay back with Kim Sim, and of course, Vincent stayed back too. SO in the end, it is only 3 GUYS 浪漫 together in the chalet on the final night!!! It happened 2 yrs ago too, during the chalet at east coast, where my classmates super off, and all dun want to stay, and end up only me, wenyan and another classmate who book tha place stay.

But anyway these past few days 让我感触蛮多的，也不知道怎么说。。。Brought back some nice memories. Those activities in the night, those secondary school chalets and of course, those late cycling trips with Sin... Haiyah, pity his bike is stolen, esp since now we live even closer together...

Really glad to have this unexpected break. Somehow strangely my sore throat or cough seems to got better, and my knee too, less pain now... Now trying to write songs again. IT has been a long long time since i can come up with something satisfactory... Mabbe I just dun have the talent to write songs. Hopefully i can come up with more songs... Trying to fill in a tune for puayhong lyrics just now, mabbe wasn't what he wanted, hopefully i can come up with something good later...

My knee hurts

2005-05-07T02:00:00.000+08:00

This afternoon i wake up and my runny nose and phlegm seems to worsen a bit. So decided to make my wy to school, since it is free, to see the doctor. Actually my main aim is to see what's wrong with my knee and i dun really care about the flu and cough.

Went back the same doctor which i had consulted with before i went for the myanmar trip. He asked me today, abt the purpose of my trip. Did i have any problems etc. Anyway I find him a bit weird. Sure, he sounded caring but i think a bit kpo. Anyway he seems quite interested to noe so just told him whatever he wanted to know. After which he digged up my status in the buddhist society in the school, and he seems a bit like Wah, wah and so on...

Questions surfaced like no one have ever explained christainity to you b4? I replied with i was from a christian school, and he was like 'but have you given christianity a chance?" Shit i shld have replied with 'have you given Buddhism a chance too?" like what joseph suggest. Anyway he mentioned something like it will be difficult to convert me anyway (since i'm the president of the society) but he just hope i will give Christianity a chance)...

Anyway he commented that my knees seems alright, at least according to his testing. He suggest i rub some onintment and it shld be alright soon. Of not go find him again. Actually i sorta believed that the knees are alright too, cos not quite possible to seriously injured both yr knees at the same time. But anyway it really hurts... :(

dedicated to a thinker

2005-05-06T02:37:00.000+08:00

My cashew nuts are gone!!! 3 possibilities:
1. Someone finished it up within 2 days.
2. My mum gave it away
3. I was dreaming about the whole casher nuts thing...
drats...

Just had an MC meeting at BL. Was beginning to feel more and more at ease during meetings. Especially at BL. I think the good atmosphere there certainly help. In fact i was sitting and standing in all sorts of 'improper' position, really treating it like my home, haha... Not bad, managed to discussed most of the things i want to discuss. Cool. Kudos to the MC members for good attendance.

A while after i had reached home and bathe, one of the MC members, X, called me to explain the situation, the problems. had a long chat with X after that. Hmmm, how can I solve this problem? Especially when I was a discreditor of X performance too. Sigh...

Had a long chat with vincent on msn after that. He certainly seems to be quite high profile. Quite a number of our MC members know about him liao, apart from the fact he turned up for exam dinner, evident when his name was brought up during the meeting, for successorship.

One of the very first thing i asked was about his buddhism background. Surprised me when i heard he got to know about Buddhism through Cindy's blog! Wah, well done! Spreading the Dharma through the blog. But from my conversation with him about how he thinks differently from other people, albeit a bit shock, his thoughts are really quite buddhistics, and quite ideal, i would say, for anyone to have. Eg: "i believe tt if one of our loved one has passed. Thou sad, but we shld celebrate the happiness n joy this person has brought to us during his living... We shld cry so hard cos it wun bring him back,.. instead we shld b commenerate him by celebrating his temendous joy that he has given us.." He was supposed to be overly-matured. In this sense, he can't be more different than me. I feel that my thinking are too childish and naive, and people always feel that i'm matured, more knowledgeable, evident from the tv game show i took part with my frens a few years back. Mabbe i just don't express myself well.

Back to vincent. We shared a bit on Buddhism and though not shock, he certainly had quite radicals views, especially on nibbana. All paths lead to nibbana. Sounds familiar to what Lena wrote in her blog but certainly not my thinking. Well, i'm a theravadanist (if there is such a word) and I feel that there are simply some areas in Buddhism where beyond words can express. Faith plays a important role and you just gotta stick strictly to what Buddha taught. Some ideals, like other traditions, sounds really good to the people, but ... ANyway i thought that we might be talking about the same thing though in different way...

I really like this quote from him, in response to a statement i made "wn someone possess a differing view, wn someone holds on to attachments. we think tat. " they r too clouded by delusions". but never seek to understand how they feel..."

Another quote "my thinking is always grey.... never a comfirm ans i think thre is... but so far i think buddhism has provided a very nice guide... tts y i liked its nature of being a guide... i think thres a reason y buddha set it in tis way... its a guide, and u hav to walk the path yrself..." Well, surprising how people can interpret the grey area differently, but i agree with him on the walking the path yourself and hapiness. So we might be talking abt the same thing in essence again.

Hee, an analysis was made wrt to my personality and wah, he sound exactly like gordon!!! Especially about they felt i'm creating a barrier around myself. Think they will make good friends with each other. Like his take on friendship. Interesting person. Shall not quote too much. Seems like intruding his privacy. Just one more "ya. i always belived in u dun need to know and understand a friend. Wat u need to know n understand r ppl u dun regard as a friend..."

Great chat. Specially like the part when i share one of my silly thoughts when i was young. Lolz... Anyway i feels my ability to express myself in words really sux, even in msn. Not to mention my Dharma knowledge. Sighz... This guy goes to sutta studies while i have only attend SSG at the most 5 times in my NUS life.

Unexpected Gift

2005-05-03T01:24:00.000+08:00

Make an unexpected visit yesterday to find young bhante. Earlier Sin came over to my place for his regular sunday workout (Gordon say he will be coming but dunno where is he... hmmm...). After some dily-dallying, some discussion about vesak day and guitar-cum-singing session (he was my second victim in two days; after IS!), we finally make our way to sim lim to look at some stuffs. I was helping my friend look for speakers but apparently couldn't find the model he wanted. Have to email him to seek for alternatives. Sin was looking at LCD monitor, as part of his plans to upgrade his PC set.

Back to IS. That guy is sooo funny and unbelievably kiddish. I was laughing throughout lunch when he told me he got lost in NUS looking for a way out to the bus-stop at the expressway. After hunting to and fro near the bushes, he decide it was too embarassing (people were looking at him) and gave up the idea of taking bus 97. LoL... Anyway at my place, he was very choosy and refuse to record a song until he had found a song he like and i can play. Well, we chose for a few hours but couldn't find one. Luckily i did a secret recording of him singing ehipassiko. It did not meant to be secret, just that i din realise he din realise i was recording. Well, all those threats came in but nah, i'm not going to delete it. heeheehee... In fact, i find his singing quite nice leh, dunno why he's so picky. Anyway IS just conveniently lie on my bed and fell asleep after that! Hmmm, sweaty and firty! eeeks!!! Remind me of somebody... (Hope he doesn't read this. He will surely really kill me after i have showed his singing to so many people, although i nvr send them the file. Just thru phone. Ahahhahah)

Back to BL visit. Kinda of strange din have any news of young bhante for 2 months liao. He din reply my last sms back then in Mar, so decide to pay him a visit. Well, he was really in and we had quite a long chat. Heehee, we hardly talk about the dharma anyway, just like a friend chat, and when i decide it is time for me to make a move, he surprise me by saying he wanted to pass me something again. Aiyo, i was damn embarass and quite adamant in telling him not to, but he say give a chance to make merit to his maths teacher. Shucks, he then rushed up the lift. I was pondering whether to make my exit but i decide against it. It will be quite rude to... The gifts were cashew nuts and ceylon tea. Exactly the same as last time, but of different kinds. not bad!

My knees are still hurting. And now, back is aching too. I hope they are fine... Sigh... Dukkha!

With an old friend

2005-04-26T21:13:00.000+08:00

Some thoughts abt the past few days

Today
Went to my secondary school fav study place - Changi Airport! With a close friend. The place brings back memories. Remember i always have to hop around from place to place with him cos we were being chased off the premises... :|

We stayed at Mac today. The place pretty big, plenty of seats, and they nvr chase us off. In fact quite a number of people dun even bother to leave something on the table (food from mac i mean) to show that they are customers. Nice place airport... But dun really like it for studying. Lie down on the table and slept for quite a while. Not very efficient. Better go back to central library...

Monday
Had my FA paper. One of the easiest exam paper I have taken in NUS, ranked only 2nd to Fluid Mechanics? But i doubt i will get an A for it, cos I'm sure the rest will find it easy too, and CA is going to count... Drats... But then again, my last module with bizad is that although i got high marks for CA, which account for 50%, my grade is only B-, so i'm more than convince bizad modules 'luan luan lai' one...
So no calculations, and no hope...

Sunday
Can't remember what i did. Mugged?

Saturday
My friend (same one as the one above) came over to my place to study. I showed him the song, and he said it was not bad, and the singer (gordon) also not bad. Then i show him my singing, he was like ....... But anyway i took out the guitar and we spent the next hour and so playing. Ahahaha, i quote from him : Siling, I can't put down the guitar. Zhen me ban?! Actually, i have the same problem whenever i take the guitar out. Anyway he taught me quite a few things about the guitar, and finding the chords for songs. When we finally started studying, it was like ... evening .........

-_-

Goodluck

2005-04-23T00:14:00.000+08:00

Have been mugging in central library for the past week, but somehow all the mugger clubs core members often were not present. Left only me, vincent and pearlyn. Yesterday was worst, only left me and vincent in the late afternoon. was a bit awkward since i dun really know him and ask pearl to join us for dinner, in case i nothing to say, ahahha. But she too lazy to join us -_-'

Anyway we had pretty much to talk anyway so no problem, after the topic on singing was touch on. I learn from he he liked my song very much too. Wah, so touched :'(...

Anyway had a pretty long conversation with a fren just now who want to go for ordination. SADHU SADHU SADHU! Its not easy to be ordain, one must have cultivated some paramis before in his past lives (as said). But currently he is met with some problems. Hope he solve them soon! Goodluck! Goodluck everyone for the exams too...

The Present

2005-04-10T21:42:00.000+08:00

Let not a man revive the past or wonder what the future holds: the past is but the left behind,the future is but the yet unreached. Rather with insight, let him see each presently arisenstate... today the effort must be made; tomorrow Death may come, who knows?

The Buddha
Majjhima Nikaya 131

Nothing Good Nothing Bad

2005-04-07T00:35:00.000+08:00

Beary looong haben blog so wanna just do a short review of the past week...

Last Friday -> Vesak day meeting. Told angel not to go cos she had a test on the following day and i know how much last minute studying is impt to most of us. But myself was kinda of held up at lab, which is very common nowadays. Can't really plan my time in advance since i dunno how long i'm going to take and i can't stop halfway. In anycase, b4 i leave, i have to autoclave those equipment to kill the bacteria which will take 1.5 hrs. sometimes i cheat a little but i'm not going to elaborate here. Back to vesak, was late. Very late. In fact wanted to take a cab down then claim from IS but decided not to. Was quite surprise to se angel there at the meeting. Anyway dunno what the meeting was about but i did noe we had a pretty nice supper session after taht at beach road market with juliana, merwin, mervin, lirong, chun kian, me, and two more person. Just can't recall... Had some chat, and the focus was on Chun Kiang and his future. Sadhu sadhu sadhu to him!

Saturday -> Recording at my place with gor and it was a better version in terms of recording and tune wise, but still din fully work out. Realise how difficult it is to get someone to sing it the way you want. Haha, but he got a nice voice anyway.

Sunday -> Soccer session. Was burnt by the sun. But fun. It was one of my more solid performance, but mabbe becos i MIA for so long liao my passion is more. Anyway even ZJ commented that after wearing Mizuno (the shoes that the 26th MC gave me) i seem to become more lihai. Anyway my stamina cannot make it. The worst of them there. Serve me right for not playing with them often. Was enjoying my shoes though. Can gradually get use to it. First time in my life that i have soccer shoes. it gives me better control but in terms of slicing the ball, i'm still not use to it...

Monday -> Nothing much, except that being stress by the test and the project due soon.

Tuesday -> The Test. was easier than expected but still make mistakes. :( Got one full qn straight from the tutorial. Exactly the same. haha...

Today -> Went quite late for lab, din see my mentor around. Decide to try to make the beads myself again. This time round, i take great care in handling it and i'm very satisfied with my work. Wastage was minimal and the size of the beads were pretty consistent too. Great job done Zea! Was packing up and thinking that my lab wasn't as bad as i thought. Even the cumbersome bacteria part doesn't seem so bad after i'm familiar with it. THe chinese saying shu neng sheng qiao is so true. However, as i was washing up, i broke another flask! :'( MY 2nd one oledi! Sigh. Really nothing gd nothing bad...

新作品 (super sneak preview)

2005-03-27T02:39:00.000+08:00

Thanks to a pretty good singer who can sing at this high key effortless, i am to present my new work. Though it sound quite different from my original version, but nonetheless, nice!!!

又到了夏日时候

词/曲: zeathereal

想要吹海风的时候
想要去让心情放松的午后
总是一个人。。。

来到我家附近的沙滩
把头仰向迎面而来的微风
我的心在想，心在想

会不会也有人像我
独自在沙滩吹着寂寞的风
有没有一点难过
这个答案连我自己也说不出口

又到了夏日时候
我们又来到这个年头
你是否依然会保留
你我曾经有的梦

好想再听你唱首歌
沉醉在优美的歌声里
仿佛又回到了
你我曾经相爱的时候

Dreaming (still) ...

挥去离别的愁绪，踏上人生新的旅程

A friend's webhosting company

What an eventful night

Check it out

IPPT

Some Updates

中国人的厉害！

Terrible

Difficult Sudoku

Wishing for health

Life moves on...

Some things

Bo Liao

胆小鬼

Bodhi Tree

Tear-ing

Dentist

Lasik Done

My draft letter to DEan's Office, Vice Dean for undergraduate program

Losing my temper (and sabotaging myself)

Presidents Breakfast

Some msn nicks

Conversation wif my 'commando' classmate...

My last day of lesson

Je n'ai pas étudié pour l'essai d'aujourd'hui

A simple poster

Someone Else Will Do It

FYP Poster Day

My FYP Poster

My 'I' is getting smaller

My Voice

Ms Sylvia

Jataka Stories

A Mexican Friend

A bit busy nowadays...

NUS Engineering admin sucks

Not telling anyone

Birthday Wishes & Gifts

Where I was born

Silver, and lost in bus AGAIN!!

Here pain there pain

Without expectations

Gifts exchange

被骂

时间

A day like the past

Mes amis (my friends)

Back from camp

One leg in

Playing ard with my (sister's) camera

最近

Selling stuffs again

My favourite sports

Mon examen plus de

My First Paper

A short entry

End of Trick 3

Back to my bed

My french class... (UPDATED!!!)

IT IS VERY VERY IRRITATING

Powerful Bacteria

Some Pics

Something is wrong with my GIT system

ALORS

Je suis malade encore!

Some Pics

Le monde est petit

Un Logement Idéal

Aktifitas Favorit Saya - My Favorite Activities

Ham Sak Dog?

Keluarga Saya

丝路

The missing song

Simple

A new beginning

Sure can't wake up tmr one :(

Excused from IPPT

Finger much better. 正骨水 is good!

Hand will need a long time to heal completely